My girlfriend fell out of love with me and I dont understand it at all

[JodieJenga1]

I had been with this girl for a year and a half, and we were pretty serious, we lived together and had a puppy, it was a lot really quickly but we both knew that, she moved in with me in my family home because she was homeless, but then it really worked, we loved each other a lot, did romantic things together, made a lot of plans for the future, got on really well with each others families. Then around a week before she broke up with me she said that she had changed her mind about living together when I go to university in a few months, because she wants us to have a more normal relationship and wants me to properly experience uni, and we can see each other in the week and at weekends, and we both got pretty excited about it, but it was a shock to me at first....and then we had one kinda strange day a few days later where i just felt like she was distant, but it didnt last all day and I asked her about it and she said she was just tried and stuff, but i told her we needed to work on doing more things together because i get suggesting we go on dates recently and she just didn't want to, and she kinda blanked me. Then she went to see her family for a few days, they dont live around here, and when she came back she literally walked in and told me that she loves me but isnt in love with me anymore. it hurt so much but in a way it didnt feel real, she kept kissing me while she was breaking up with me, and saying she wanted to be best friends...and then she was texting me all night saying she misses me, thinks she's made a mistake, stuff like that..

I said we can give it another go because we do mean so much to each other but wanted to go slow...this is where im so confused, a few days after we broke up it was like it was back to normal, she wanted to hold my hand, kiss me, told me she was looking forward to the day she can ask me to be her girlfriend again....and then as time went on, she got really cold in texts, but when we met up she was still all over me, saying we'll be ok and stuff like that...but then she went cold with me again for a few days, ignoring me, so I rang her to see what she was thinking and she made some excuse and tried to make me feel guilty, she kept saying she needed more time to decide what she wants, and it had been 3 weeks by now and i just said that she should know by now if she still feels anything for me so lets just call it a day...i contacted her 2 days later and she told me that she was just waiting to see if the feelings come back, but as time went on they didnt, and she doesn't love me.

I dont understand how she was that confused, and how she fell out of love with me in a week, i know people will say it would have been in her head longer but honestly she says it wasnt and she doesnt know how it happened, and the day before she went away for a few days she made some passing comment about me not talking about morbid things because she still wants to be with me in 60 years....why say all that stuff? its really inconcievable to me, we had so much planned out for the future and she's always been really vocal about how much she loves me, and we always work on our problems and communicate. Im just hurt and confused and she has been so cold about this, like I said a few things just to try and make it seem i wasnt as hurt as I was and she just agreed. Ive said i dont want to be talking to her now, and we can try and work on being friends in a few months, but she still texts me saying be careful and stuff like taht, im so confused.

[smackie9]

She is lying but not about it just happening. When people just turn around and say "I want out", that usually means they have met someone. She might not be seeing someone per say, but this person may have stirred up feelings that make her feel amazing making her realize what she been missing. I don't think she is being totally honest with you...she is just avoiding it by saying crap like "need time to think", "I'm confused right now" "maybe we can be friends"....it's all a smoke screen.

Oh by the way, when people talk about marriage, where they want to live, how many kids, their names blah blah blah.....it's just that "talk", and should never be taken as a promise. When the relationship is fairly new, people just do that, talk, dream because of how they feel at that moment....but like you just witnessed it can disappear over night.

[James87]

Thanks for your post.