Ok, first off it's my first post. So hello everyone! My name's TJ.
I am in a real situation right now, I am lost, confused. I've hurt the only friend I have.
-- Here's a backstory --
I have started studying abroad, as an international student for 4 years.
I have a complicated relationship with my gf, she is studying in my home country and we have come to the mutual agreement even though we're together, we're free to do as we please while we're apart.
I'm currently in my second year, and i'm missing my gf more and more.
Now here's the issue:
Since I arrived I have made a really great friend, he's a couple of years older than me, more mature, wiser, a good laugh, we can talk about anything. I see him like I see my older brother. Both of us being foreigners to where we are studying, I know he considers me a close friend of his too.
He has a unique way of dating girls. There is no bs with him, he loves women's company and normally nothing gets too serious between him and the girl. He technically ''dates'' more than one girl at a time. The women he see's are fine with it as they make agreements and discuss what he/she wants from this relationship.
(You could say he has multiple FWB's ''friends with benefits'' at one time)
One girl he has been seeing, I slept with one night after a party about 2 weeks ago. We were both drunk and being in my situation i'm in, i'm free to do as I please. It was only a one night thing.
But, part of me knew what I did was wrong.
I told him everything, exactly what happened, the situation.
After talking, I realized I stepped over the line. I was disrespectful and he told me he expected more from me. I had broken a bro code of some kind.
I'm still young and quite inexperienced when it comes to handling situations like this or things I should/shouldn't do.
I know he told me that out of all the other people we could have slept with, it was the 2 of us. His close friend + a girl he's been seeing.
I really didn't know what I thought his reaction was going to be, but it caught me off guard when it turned out he was disappointed in me...
I feel like I have deceived and made a fool of my only real friend here. Our relationship is what I want to fix, it's my priority. There is no future with this girl and I so keeping my buddy is all I want :/
I have told him that if/when he wants to talk to me again i'll be waiting. I want to give him some space and some time to think.
Flame/hate/negative comments towards me are allowed.
I just want people's honest opinion. I havnt seen on any forums a situation quite like this - hence why I have made this post.
I hope someone rational can deduce a solution or what i should do.
I feel so terrible right now.
Thank you