I was dumped my girlfriend about a month and a bit ago. we were with eachother for two and a half years and she basically lived at my flat. giving her stuff back basically felt like i was moving house. she cried so hard. shes now 22 and im 26. we work at the same place, and i encouraged her for promotion throughout the relationship and she is now a supervisor/manager. we broke up with me over two meetings, the first one she said we wanted different things, she wanted to move in and grow up and i didnt, however i have been thinking about asking her to live with me for a while and planned to do it on her birthday (november time). i told her this and realled off a load of other problems and blamed it all on me. most notably because i lied to her about quitting smoking and we had a massive argument (caused by some shit stirrer at work) with each other towards the end of the relationship, and i lost my temper and got very angry at the shit stirrer, but took it out on her. i kno what i should have done, but didn't and made mistakes.

i kno that after the break up she was extremely upset and would keep busy, but i dont know if she was upset because of how much she hurt me or she actually cared.

since the break up i have been a wreck, all our friends r the same people and she has managed to block me out of her life, and it feels like i have no effect on her n e more. i have not bombarded her with texts and phone calls and havent interacted with her at all really. but we work together at least three days a week since and i kno she can see my pain. all our friends have seen me in my worst and have advised me the best way they see fit but i havent always listened and they feel like they are not getting through to me. and now i feel i have pushed them away. i sent a letter to her saying how much i care for her and have learnt so much from the mistakes i made, trying really hard to make the letter not seem pushy and not begging for her. but our friends just see her so happy and me always miserbale. especially the people we work with.

the relationship was two and half years long and for the majority we would always say how good it was. but obviously i lost her trust and upset her through other means. it seems like she really stripped it all back and only remembered the bad time we had. the thought of her meeting someone better than me, or wanting someone better than me is so ****ed up. i am in the most pain i have ever been in and have idea how to deal with the situation.

since i sent the letter a week and a half ago , she seemed angry at points and seemed her normal self at other points, its mostly when i look happy that she looks angry. although i made her laugh the other day, i sed good buy to her inpassing through the office at work, but had to clock out, so i was like "er this is awkward" and she laughed and was like"why becuase u sed goodbye and didnt leave?" and i sed it at the same time and we shared a ****ing laugh ... if seemed great and was like the banter we used to have. i kno i shouldnt be thinking about that too much but shit, it hurts lol

i am asking for any advice from the people on her, as to whether they think the letter was a good/bad idea and how do i make her see me as the guy she fell in love with rather than the guy she fell out of love with. have i ****ed it up with the letter. the letter is the only other time i have mentioned my feelings since the breakup and as i previously sed i have tried to give her space enough so not to crowd her with texts and make her annoyed at me. did i do the right thing with the letter? if you want any more info please talk to me i really need some fresh thoughts. i hope this all makes some sense.

do you girls have any thoughts of this, i am thinking of ways to regain a contact and wave a white flag to express a truce and ask her to talk to me about things, in a corny way to make her laugh.. but i dont know if she is happy with the situation as it is or if she would appreciate a talk with me. she looks happy a lot and is throwing herself into her job and friends. and becuase we share the same friends, its hard to do for me. and there is a party at the end of the week that both of us are going to be at. and its with mutual friends.... what do i do? and do u think i have a chance of reconciliation? does it sound like she is happy without me? and what sort of thing would you like (if anything) for an ex to say? Please dont think of me as a scumbag, im a nice guy, and what do you think she feels of the letter, its been two weeks and she hasn't approached me about it. (i can post it if you want to read it) x