Completely lost need help

[Merkaba]

I am a 22 male my girlfriend is 18. We have been together for a year and a half. Everything has been perfect. We never fight or anything like that. She just started beauty school two months ago. I told her before she started that it is going to be tough not seeing each other as much and all that. So anyway... yesterday she calls me and tells me she doesn't have to work if I would like to hang out. I said of course i'll come pick you up...she said i'm already on the road from work i'll be over in a bit. So she gets here and she said she isn't feeling well. We go inside and she seems out of it. So I ask her if anything is on her mind. She says that she has a lot of things on her mind like school, work, parents, ect. and then she says she is thinking about us. That she really likes school and she wants to do some much. She is confused about us and needs space and time. ( Which i've always given her all the time for any reason.) I walk her to her car and I tell her I am here for you and that I just want you to be happy. She says I love you and leaves. I haven't seen her or talked to her since. I am lost and don't know what to do. My heart feels broke and I miss her so bad. Any advice or comments would help a lot. Thanks

[bohemiandonut]

Ouch.

Another classic case of the undecided female syndrome, as if being your girlfriend is somehow the ultimate choice she will make in her life.

I think the healthiest thing for you do is the same thing she is. That is, take some time for yourself as well. It's going to be hard not to call her, but don't. It's going to be hard not to email her, but don't. Just hang out with friends, go to parties, excercise, etc. There are many reasons for this:

1. If she never contacts you again, you will have adjusted to your new single life, and have become more rational and less emotional, allowing you to really decide your next course of action.
2. If she does contact you, you will have a better idea of what she feels. Her actions won't be tainted by the fact that you may have influenced them.

Since your situation is so vague, I would probably send her ONE e-mail, just asking her what's going through her head. You don't have to skirt the issue, be direct. If you want to know if she considers you her boyfriend anymore, ask her. You have a right to know.

If she's totally unresponsive, or continues to avoid any real discussion, I would break up with her. This isn't that extreme, because if she wants to be with you, she will fight it. And if she fights it, you can let her know that you aren't looking for a girlfriend that won't hang out with you. You're not, right?

Peace and good luck.