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Thread: How to get GF to initiate sex more often?!?

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    How to get GF to initiate sex more often?!?

    Ok. So I am in a great relationship, about to be married. Sex life I really can't complain about, especially after reading some other peoples horror stories. Mine is pretty good, get sex at least 3 to 5 times a week(usually), but 99% of the time, I initiate it.

    I am very giving in bed, probably too giving. At least 2 times a week I give her oral, with nothing in return. She NEVER gives anyhing in return after I please her orally! Now, if I please her orally for a while, then I jump on and have sex, of course I get pleased... but again, I did all the work. But if I just give her oral, until she orgasms, then she is done, she doesn't think to give me a blowjob - I don't ask usually. In the past, if I do ask, I will either get "I thought it was my fun time..." or something like that. Or if she does do the blowjob, she won't be very enthused during it - and we guys know, we need enthusasm during a blowjob, it can't seem like a chore to her or it is no fun. And she NEVER(well, almost never) gives me a blowjob, from start to finish, just me... If she gives me a blowjob, it is during 4play, and sometimes after sex, if she orgasms first, again, 99% of the time she will just rub my balls with her hand, and have ME finish(sometimes after she cums she doesn't want to have sex anymore because it is too intense.)... Yet if I finish first, I finish her with oral, toys, whatever she wants.

    So I don't know what to do. In the past, I have always just given her more and more, in hopes to get more in return... but that didn't seem to work... should I maybe change my stratigy and give less? I don't like doing that really though because I love pleasing her. I love making her orgasm. I guess that is what I don't understand. She doesn't seem to love pleaseing me as much as I love pleaseing her. How can I get her to be more initiating and want to please me more?
    Last edited by OneQuestion; 12-03-10 at 03:22 AM.

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    Help me out ladies!

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    See? You have so many problems yet you're marrying her instead of addressing the issues at hand.

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    But she is more giving then lots of ladies I have read about...

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    This is all so hard to hear Don't feel bad at all, I shouldn't say this....

    Nevermind...

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    Maybe she's a little shy/reserved? I would casually drop hints like you think its so sexy when the woman initiates. Hopefully she can pick up on those hints and will want to make you a happy camper. If she can't pick up on the hints I would maybe talk to her about it, not in an accusing manner where she'd feel attacked but say that it would make you feel more desired or whatever. Steer clear from the "you never's" and use things like "I wish" or "I feel" so she doesn't feel under fire. If she feels attacked she's not going to want to initiate, she'll feel obligated to because you called her out and probably not enjoy herself.
    So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
    blue skies from pain.
    Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
    A smile from a veil?
    Do you think you can tell?
    And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
    Hot ashes for trees?
    Hot air for a cool breeze?
    Cold comfort for change?
    And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?

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    Giving don't mean shit. Sorry man.

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    Quote Originally Posted by QueenofCorona View Post
    Maybe she's a little shy/reserved? I would casually drop hints like you think its so sexy when the woman initiates. Hopefully she can pick up on those hints and will want to make you a happy camper. If she can't pick up on the hints I would maybe talk to her about it, not in an accusing manner where she'd feel attacked but say that it would make you feel more desired or whatever. Steer clear from the "you never's" and use things like "I wish" or "I feel" so she doesn't feel under fire. If she feels attacked she's not going to want to initiate, she'll feel obligated to because you called her out and probably not enjoy herself.
    I feel like I have tried this before, but I will try more!

    Is there anything physical I can do that might make her change? Giver her less or something, not totally cut away, but don't give her the things she doesn't give me, like oral from start to finish, only do it for her during 4play like she does for me... don't lick her ass.. etc... But still be sexual with her, just not give her the extras, would that perhaps help?

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