Too Shy, Need Advise :(

[shychick]

Hi all!
I'm new here... and desperately need some advise!!! I like this guy....he lives in the same building as I and we occasionally say "hi" off and on but neva really talked until recently- I was reading a book (study) at that time when he approached me and he asked me about what I was reading and that if I needed help with it, he would help. From other instances, the way he looked at me and said "hi", I think that he likes me. But... I am tooooo shy!!! I read somewhere that if you're too shy you could use book or some object as a means of someone approaching to you if they like you and I think that's exactly what happened with me, although it wasn't intentional on my part... lol. Now the trouble is I want to see him..... but I am just so shy can't get myself to tell him or make the move!!! Please anyone any suggestions???? How do I do this??? I miss him when he's not around and wanna dissappear when I have to face him!

[ExpoNovak]

He likes you. There is no possible scenario that I can think of in which a guy is going to stop, ask you what you are reading and offer to help with your studies (i.e. start a conversation) if he doesn't have at least marginal interest.

You must now construct an outfit entirely out of saran wrap and arrive in said outfit at his door wearing a big smile and carrying a case of beer.

[shychick]

thanx ExpoNovak for your advice! Yes, I know that he does like me but my trouble is even though I realize that he made it easier by offering to help me out... I am shy to do so. I don't know how to muster that courage/confidence and go... I think of ways to just do so but when it comes down to it, I can't do it.

[Gigabitch]

He's done 95% of the work. If you can't come up with the other 5%, you don't deserve a boyfriend. There it is.

[shychick]

Dear Gigabitch,

Thanks for your "opinion." That was too quick of a judgement to make ... you don't even know me.

The sorta culture I come from, women are not so responsive or rather so bold to approach a guy, even if she likes him and just her smiling and making frequent (not bold) eye contact or glances means a "yes" for the guy.

So maybe according to your "standards" you're right, but I disagree.
A suggestion for YOU: Don't be so quick to judge others next time.

[Gigabitch]

Dear Gigabitch,

Thanks for your "opinion." That was too quick of a judgement to make ... you don't even know me.

What I know is what you've told me, so you only have yourself to blame. Nobody "knows" anybody here. Duh.

I don't know what your culture usually does to get people together. If you have to get someone to have a party and invite everyone from your building just so you will have another opportunity to make yourself available to him, then why don't you try to get that going?

I'm not sure what your actual question is, here. If it's about the fact that you are too shy to even look him in the face, then you have a personal problem that needs addressing, and I believe that the best way to do that is to just suck it up and make yourself say something to him.

If what you have is a cultural problem, where you're prevented by social restraints from approaching him, then you need to explain that in your first post, so you don't get your feelings all hurt and start freaking out.

[Maybelline]

Heh just find a common ground and start a conversation from there.

[Only-virgins]

The sorta culture I come from, women are not so responsive or rather so bold to approach a guy, even if she likes him and just her smiling and making frequent (not bold) eye contact or glances means a "yes" for the guy.

Horrible culture, it should be the other way around since girls are more picky...it makes more logical sense to do the picking and going after.

[Junket]

So maybe according to your "standards" you're right, but I disagree.
A suggestion for YOU: Don't be so quick to judge others next time.

Oh shut the fúck up about that culture bullshit.

If it was really your "culture" you wouldn't be come here asking for help, would you? Clearly for your "culture" to have been passed on people managed to overcome these "restraints". What if your mom did what you're doing now? You wouldn't be here!

Don't blame your culture, and don't throw a hissy fit. You gotta put in some god damn effort. I'm here with Giga. If you can't muster enough confidence to reciprocate interest, than I hope he finds a girl who does.

It will only be your loss.

So far he's, done everything right.

Now it's your turn.

Don't argue, just do it.