Fearing future breakup

[Ty20]

My girlfriend plans to got to Peru as a missionary in a couple years. We currently live 4 hours apart and miss each other beyond words. We've become so close, and connected that she asked me yesturday if we had a future together. I said I want whats best for her. She said maybe I could find a cute girl in my area with a similar life path, and I lost it. I said I couldn't imagine it, and I couldn't handle the thought. I asked her if she could find a guy, with her path, and she said she couldn't imagine it either. So we cried. We both love each other as much as always, but this throws a huge kink in our plans. I'm afraid that my love for her will let her go, and make it hurt way too much. Any suggestions, similar situations?

[independent]

Whatever you do, dont hold her back from her dreams or goals in life... And dont apply guilt. Love her and support her - and for now enjoy your time together. Try not to get too caught up in what will happen 2 years from now. Life has a funny way of changing plans, and changing people - in many ways. Be grateful for every day that you have someone that you love and find friendship with... and let that carry you through for now. Try to encourage her to do the same.

Just my 2 cents.

[Rosebud]

I agree with the above post. Don't dwell on might happen and concentrate on what's going on now. You too obviously care for each other and you guys will do what is best for you both!

[shh!]

If she is planning to go off and do missionary work, I am guessing you are both quite young. That being the case, your relationship probably wouldn't last anyway, statistically speaking.

On a side note, I strongly disapprove of missionary work, except for the humanitarian relief portion.

[Ty20]

If she is planning to go off and do missionary work, I am guessing you are both quite young. That being the case, your relationship probably wouldn't last anyway, statistically speaking.

On a side note, I strongly disapprove of missionary work, except for the humanitarian relief portion.

Your right we're young. We certainly have a long way to go, but everything tells me we'd want to stay together if possible. Things may change, thanks for the advice you guys.

[mhussain]

mate , enjoy this pain. when she comes back , you will realise how muchthis pain is worth.

absence is to love what wind is to fire, it extinguishes the small, and fans the great.

Hussain

[Chlorine]

Ty20----If your girl wants to do missionary work, let her go. It's good for her to pursue her goals now. During her time away, she will change. Peru will be an experience. An experience you won't share. When she comes back, if she still wants to be with you, than you guys can talk about the future than. It's really considerate and mature of her to suggest that maybe you can find someone else. It shows that she doesn't expect you to wait for her.

[Ty20]

Ty20----If your girl wants to do missionary work, let her go. It's good for her to pursue her goals now. During her time away, she will change. Peru will be an experience. An experience you won't share. When she comes back, if she still wants to be with you, than you guys can talk about the future than. It's really considerate and mature of her to suggest that maybe you can find someone else. It shows that she doesn't expect you to wait for her.

Thats my fear. She'll go to Peru, and when or if she comes back she will see things differently. This would be ok with me if I could accept she is really different, and we are incompatable, but I can't do that. She is everything I want, and more. We think alike, we like the same things, have similar values, and we are extremely attracted to each other. The funny thing is that when she mentioned I could find another girl, I was so touched by it, that I couldn't help but love her more, and it was an even more terrifying prospect. I don't want her to wait either, but deep down I know there is no one as special as her.

[mhussain]

Ask yourself for once. what can you do? Nothing.

you must succumb to the fact that there is a very real possibility that things may not remain the same between you.

you can wait for her to come back. if thats what you choose to do, please make sure that you let her know. dont force/expect her to do the same.

If not, then let her know that too and again, dont expect her to do the same.

watching someone you love go away in front of your eyes is a torture devised in hell. i can empathise but your pain is your own.

i am sorry mate, really am

Hussain