Why do men cheat?

[KeyKandiss13]

This has been a question that every woman asks about a man why do they cheat? If you have everything you need at home and have the best woman ever why cheat. it makes no sense at all men mess up perfectly good relationships to dip in another woman cup of pudding. why not talk to you girl and see what her views are on have another woman. honestly I'd rather him do it in my face rather then behind my back at least i know what he's doing. but doing it without causes it to be cheating. If a man wants an open relationship say it! its so much better to be open and honest then your giving that woman a chance to see if she wants to be with you or not. the problem with this is if the shoe was on the other foot a man would dump a woman in a min. but a woman is suppose to hold on and believe in her partner. men get so insecure about just as women do. please tell me why this happens?

[Cerby]

I take offence to your generalization of men. Women cheat too.

If you have a bad relationship, leave it. Don't assume because something isn't working, that everyone is dealing with the same problem.

[michelle23]

Some men are narcissists: they have no empathy for your feelings, they dont understand or care about the emotional turmoil they inflict on their partner. They will cheat repeatedly no matter how perfect you are. Narcissists have a very fragile ego and they see a new conquest as an ego boost. It also gives them a sense of power if the target is difficult to achieve (the trill of the chase) they may also use cheating as a way to punish their partner for percieved wrongs. Look up narcisicm and cheating

some men are insecure and they feel like their not good enough to get the type of woman they really want so they settle for second best and wait for something better to come along. They always think the grass is greener and are never happy with what they have. If they do manage to get their perfect woman-it just makes them even more insecure coz they are convinced they are not good enough for you, they think youll hurt them, cheat on them or leave them for someone else so they do it first to hurt you first, they may also do it to boost their ego, to feel more attractive, to look good to others etc

some men are emotionally immature. The use cheating as a way to escape from reality. Instead of trying to solve the problems in your relationship, they take the easy way out or escape for awhile. They cant handle reality, real life, real relationships, real responsibility. They could be the perfect partner when everything is good between u but then bail as soon as things get tough.

Some men lack the inner strenght necessary for a real relationship. They are weak. Again when everythings good they are great but they wilk hurt you during a rough patch coz they cant handle it.

Some men cheat as a way out of an unhappy relationship coz they dont have the balls to end it with dignity.

Some men are sex addicts.

If a man cheats on you-its not ur fault. He has issues-not you and you should just dump him and find yourself a better man. Someone who is confident, inner strenght, emotional maturity, integtity and emotuonal intelligence

[Cerby]

Some men are narcissists: they have no empathy for your feelings, they dont understand or care about the emotional turmoil they inflict on their partner. They will cheat repeatedly no matter how perfect you are. Narcissists have a very fragile ego and they see a new conquest as an ego boost. It also gives them a sense of power if the target is difficult to achieve (the trill of the chase) they may also use cheating as a way to punish their partner for percieved wrongs. Look up narcisicm and cheating

some men are insecure and they feel like their not good enough to get the type of woman they really want so they settle for second best and wait for something better to come along. They always think the grass is greener and are never happy with what they have. If they do manage to get their perfect woman-it just makes them even more insecure coz they are convinced they are not good enough for you, they think youll hurt them, cheat on them or leave them for someone else so they do it first to hurt you first, they may also do it to boost their ego, to feel more attractive, to look good to others etc

some men are emotionally immature. The use cheating as a way to escape from reality. Instead of trying to solve the problems in your relationship, they take the easy way out or escape for awhile. They cant handle reality, real life, real relationships, real responsibility. They could be the perfect partner when everything is good between u but then bail as soon as things get tough.

Some men lack the inner strenght necessary for a real relationship. They are weak. Again when everythings good they are great but they wilk hurt you during a rough patch coz they cant handle it.

Some men cheat as a way out of an unhappy relationship coz they dont have the balls to end it with dignity.

Some men are sex addicts.

If a man cheats on you-its not ur fault. He has issues-not you and you should just dump him and find yourself a better man. Someone who is confident, inner strenght, emotional maturity, integtity and emotuonal intelligence

Replace "Some men" with "Some men and women" and you'll have a decent summary.

[michelle23]

And i agree with cerby. Its not true that all men cheat and women can be just as bad. Its 50-50

[michelle23]

"you must spread some reputation around before giving it to cerby again" yup some women cheat for the exact same reasons.

[Rowen]

I take offence to your generalization of men. Women cheat too.

If you have a bad relationship, leave it. Don't assume because something isn't working, that everyone is dealing with the same problem.

I completely agree that it's not just men. Women do it too.

Seriously, though, if it wouldn't end up being a giant wall of text, I'd see if Ashley would mind if I copy and pasted some of our emails to each other because we discussed this a bit. lol

Anyway, BACK TO THE MAIN POINT... I agree with Michelle.
Some people cheat because of how they're raised. It's basic psychology. Some of them grow up in broken homes and families that have tons of problems, so any sort of close commitment scares them. Then they try committing and end up cheating because they can't stick to the person. Now, not all of the people from broken homes are like that. My family has enough problems for their own soap opera, but I'm not a cheater. At the same time, there are some others who are raised and spoiled by their parents with attention and whatnot. Again, while this is not every child that's spoiled with attention, there are a number that grow up to have the same attention seeking mentality. These are the ones who, in my opinion, are most likely to be "serial cheaters" who do it more than once and/or with more than one person. An excellent example is my friend Jasmine. She was best friends for four years with her ex before dating him and eventually becoming his fiance after 4-5 more years. In that relationship, his attention seeking mentality led him to cheat on her again and again. Each time, his manipulation convinced her to take him back. But once she started getting busy with school, he craved attention and ran off with a stripper. Now, he's currently engaged to the stripper and expecting a baby with her. Yet, this does not stop him from attempting to crawl back to Jasmine again and again to try and get attention from her. And he doesn't even care how much it hurts her emotionally. There are people out there like that.

Then there are those who have a relationship only for convenience. These are the ones who may also become serial cheaters, as they get into relationships with people simply because it's better than being alone. They don't have to be into the person; all they have to do is settle and go through the motions. In the end, it works to their advantage because, while they might strike out going after a one night stand or a casual sexual pursuit, they still have a "sure thing" at home. It's sick, but there are people out there like that. Again, not everyone who does the convenience thing is a cheater, though.

Then there are the select few who try to run harems (or male harems too). These the people that will go so far as to extend it to multiple relationships just because they feel entitled to it and like the control. My first boyfriend was like this, actually. It usually works the best if the person exists only online, as they most commonly know nothing of anyone else. I didn't know until I dumped him, yet I had my suspicions.

The ones that scare me the most, however, are the ones that cheat because they were cheated on in the past. My last ex was like this... When John was in high school, it was hell for him. He was tormented beyond belief by both people at school and his family. While he found a number of dates, they each took their tolls on him, and a number cheated on him a few times. This implanted the mentality in his head that he needed to be a prick like that in order to be successful in relationships. He cheated on me 7 times, if I'm not mistaken.
You see, these are the cases of good people who become destroyed over it...the "hero who loses their mind," if you will. They scare me because they can have a good heart, but they seek out to destroy themselves and anything close to them. They lose sight of who they are. Perhaps, looking back, this is another reason why I stayed with John for so long...

These are just some things I'd like to add to Michelle's post.
Honestly, what the world needs to remember is that if someone cheats on you, it's not the end of the world. You know why? Because for every dick and cunt who doesn't respect you, there's someone out there who will. Love is out there. You just have to let it happen.

[smackie9]

Statistically men are more likely to cheat over women.....but women are more likely to have emotional affairs over sexual ones. So I say if you included emotional affairs it would be about 50/50.

[smackie9]

People cheat because they are too much of a coward to leave the relationship.

[Love'sReject]

How do you even provide accurate figures for cheating? IMPOSSIBLE. Anyway, yes, women cheat too ya know...Not that I would list other members but let's just say they are resistible...Some of these broads BRAG about it, same as guys do.

[Nicki XoXo]

Most of the time men cheat. If a woman cheat its usually for lack of emotion, attention or to get back at the guys that cheated on her.

[Love'sReject]

Whoa, cheating IS NEVER OK, regardless of gender.

[Nicki XoXo]

No, cheating is wrong. But some men will force a woman to cheat by not treating her good so she has to prove a point that she is beautiful and wanted and some women will damn near push their man into another woman's arms from not doing him right or just letting him be the man or acting as if they dont care.

[Love'sReject]

No, she CHOSE to cheat regardless. They aren't FORCED to.

[Nicki XoXo]

If you say so.