First Date No Kiss

[Raze]

So, I had my first date with this girl today who turned out to be really nice. We both got there early for the date. We hugged each other when we met (this is the girl from match.com). We went ice skating. I held her hand while we skated. I guess there has to be some chemistry for hand holding right? We talked about everything and really got to know each other.

Then, we stopped ice skating because we were both sore (it really chafes the ankles) and we talked some more. We were leaning in close as we talked (and no it was not within kissing proximity so don't get any ideas). I'm just laying down the body language I noticed.

We took a walk together for a while. Then we sat on a bench and I asked her what her views on kissing on the first date are. She said she's more comfortable kissing on the second or third. So, I took that as WARNING: do not go in for the kiss.

I walked her back to the car and we gave each other a long hug and then she said "I really liked being with you, we should do it again." She wants to see me again, but I just feel bad that we didn't kiss. Everyone says YOU HAVE TO KISS ON THE FIRST DATE. Is this true?

She also said that this was her first actual date. She's very cute, nice, and classy which is why I was surpised when she told me.

[vashti]

You should probably quit listening to what everyone else says you should be doing on your first date, and start listening to what SHE thinks. After all, you are trying to date HER, aren't you?

Anyway, aren't you the kid that told her you expected to hold hands on the first date? You didn't negotiate a kiss, so don't be greedy.

[lostinconfusion]

go with the flow. don't think about dating rules, they are bullshit.

[miSSleepy]

You seem really young.
There is no rule about kisses and dates, I don't know who you've been talking to. You seem to like this girl and she seems to like you. You had a relatively unique date and felt chemistry. You even talked to her about it, and she told you clearly how she feels - that's much more than what happens on most dates.

You should be glad about this, not stressing over the kiss that didn't happen. It will happen when it happens.

[Raze]

Well, for the record, I'm not that young lol. I'm 22. I'm still in college and my friends give me bad advice I think. I looked at yahoo answers and they all said if you don't kiss on the first date, you messed up. I'm experienced with dating, but I always feel bad when there's no kiss and I don't want to rush anything either. I think it's mainly my friends and people on other sites mixed with my recent insecurities with females that made me ask that.

[miSSleepy]

Well, you still SEEM young, by proving to be so naive as to take the word of Yahoo Answers.
Stop "taking advice" and build your own experiences.

[BoredGeorge]

Women will generally try to hurt you because it gives them power over you and they want to feel powerful so they will use that power.

I know it sucks but that is just life.

[miSSleepy]

What does that have anything to do with this thread?

[Raze]

Well, I asked her if she wanted to go on a second date this weekend and she said she would, she doesn't know what time yet. So, I guess I have to wait and see.

[tonks]

Goodluck on your second date.
And yeah pretty much.. stop following rules..
In the end its what you and her feel comfortable about.

[Luscious]

I think the fact she agreed on a second date is more valuable than kissing on a first date. And that you felt chemistry even more. Sounds like you both had a great date. Whoever started with the whole "who doesn't kiss on the first date messed up" - nonsense either had one bad experience about it, or just simply had nothing better to do then making something up.

Either way, as some has said, I agree: just go with the flow. Wait out another date or maybe two. A relationship won't be better in the long end if you kissed on the first date or on the third, I believe.

Good luck on the second date, nevertheless!