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Thread: Should I reconnect with her or move on?

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    2

    Should I reconnect with her or move on?

    I will try to sum up everything which has happened without wasting too much of your time.

    I met this girl two years ago and we were really great friends, we met through a mutual friend online and instantly became friends. We talked everyday without failure. I live in England and she lives in Sweden therefore we have never had the chance to meet in person. She was the only person I would be happy to talk to at any point. I had feelings for this girl, however sadly she was already taken therefore, I respected that and did not try to intrude. Nevertheless, although I held back the feelings I had for her, I was still grateful of just being able to speak to her, she was amazing in every way and we just connected, it felt natural talking with her. For the first few months everything was amazing, we talked on skype and played games, we simply had fun however, her boyfriend started to feel jealous of us speaking a lot, this led to arguments between them and overall it seemed like a toxic relationship between them both. I felt bad as I believed it was my fault although we continued speaking as she did not want to stop, nor did I.

    Her boyfriend then started going onto her accounts, pretending to be her and speaking to me, saying that we should stop talking. He also blocked me on multiple occasions. He seemed very controlling of her and untrusting as he would not listen when she explained to him that we were friends. We briefly stopped speaking after a year, leading to half a year of talking on and off. Due to her boyfriend trying to block contact between us. I felt bad for speaking to her as I believed it was all due to me and I did not want to destroy their relationship, I was torn between speaking to my best friend and letting her be with her boyfriend. Half a year ago, I chose to respect her and her boyfriend by not speaking to her anymore, even though every part of me wanted to unbearably bad. Over the past 6 months I have been checking on her facebook to make sure she was okay and happy as I still cared for her. And for the last few weeks I have been contemplating whether I should reconnect with her and last week I noticed that (although I am not certain) her and her boyfriend have broken up.

    In the time we were talking I felt as though we both had feelings for each other however, it never went any further as she was already taken. My question to you is whether I should message her again, or just let her be and move on for good.

    Thanks for your time.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    190
    First off her BF was not controlling, he was bloody well upset at her inappropriate behavior with you. You both were involved in an emotional affair. lets face it, it had romantic intentions. Would you not act the same way her BF did?? You bet you would. She is not the victim here, she is the instigator. She treated him poorly, and she led you on for her own selfish needs. You would be a fool to reconnect with a girl that sees nothing wrong with spending loads of time with another guy. Once she is bored with you, she is going to find herself someone else right in front of you. Stay away from girls who have BFs and who are willing to cheat on them. Move on.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jul 2016
    Gender
    Male
    Posts
    2
    I guess I never really thought about it in that way, thanks for your help!

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