Had a break up thoughts and opinions on everything that happened

[xztjohn]

I want your guys thoughts and opinions on everything that transpired. I am little confused on how someone you thought you knew so well changed into someone completely different. I also am curious on your guys thou ghts and opinion on the new guy she is dating. Here is what happened.

Me and my ex girlfriend are in college and have been dating for 1 year and a half. We are 20 years old and throughout our relationship we had some problems but we always managed to work things out. There were alot of back and forth break ups after the final one, this is basically what happened. I was pissed at her for this thing she didn't do and I decided to break up with her. Then I wanted to get back with her, but after a couple of days of trying I can tell she wasn't the same. She began to be alot more distant and then she broke it off. After months of back and forth talking, she cared about me and would always ask my friends on how i was doing in a time span of a month. I took the break up really hard and had to talk to friends for support and even went to a school psychologist because I wasn't used to these emotions, this is my first real girlfriend btw. Well my ex lives in a household with 4 girls and 4 other guys and this particular guy, when me and my ex were dating he would not talk to me when I tried to get to know him. He was really distant from the other guys in the household and just plain weird. I thought it was odd but I didn't think much of it. Well when me and my ex broke up she was real depressed as was I and that guy basically took advantage of the situation and started to swoon her by supporting her and getting on dates with her. I don't really know the specific time, but my ex was thinking about getting back with me since she had a long conversation with one of my good friends which they met up accidentally. She said she always talked about me with him and that I was constantly in her mind. Well this one incident during the break up I accidentally saw her at a party and out of emotions asked to talk with her and asked if she would take me back. In summation what happened was she said no and went back in, her guy saw that she was sad and said where the **** in so and so, and **** that guy. Being all tough when I left the party. During the break we had sex like 2 times I believe while they were dating. First time she seduced me by cuddling in my bed and I missed her so much cuddled with her then she began to tough my dick and then we got it on. Fast forward, This guy is pretty ugly which my ex admits and seems like a total loser and he never had a real girlfriend before. My ex told him that we hooked up one time and he was pretty pissed about it and said that out of his true love for her he will forgive her. This is like less than a month we are talking about, this guy sounds like a tool. My ex had other relationships before with 3 other people and said I am the first person that she truly loved just to note. I called her one night and just straight up asked her if she had sex with the guy and she said yes. That really hurt me alot and out of emotions which I admit was my fault I asked if I could see her since I knew that it was over. We met and had sex that night and then we talked for the next couple of days. After the break I sent her a long email message about everything and poured all my feelings to her pretty much indicating my faults in our relationship and the things she done wrong. She really wanted me back and texted, called, and emailed me asking for me back, but I wasn't having it. During winter break there was no contact between us at all. She said that the letter I wrote her hurt her alot and that she was real depressed over the break. I haven't seen her for awhile and when we got back on campus I had trouble on this hw assignment and asked if she could help me since she was taking the class to. I thought I moved on already but when I saw her the emotions got the best of me and I just asked her questions bout our relationship and asked for a hug from her. The next day my emotions were really high and I asked for her back. I knew in my mind that it wasn't a good idea but tried anyways and got rejected. We haven't talked since.

I'll give my opinion on both of them and you guys could give your opinions on the whole situation and the two people as well as myself. My thoughts on my ex girlfriend is that she is weak, lacks self respect, afraid to be alone, hasn't really learned anything from the break up, was vulnerable and got taken advantage of, and seems to change for the worse than when I first met her. I know that she doesn't like the guy that much, because she told me herself. But I think that might change as time passes. As for my thoughts on the guy I think he is a complete loser, took advantage of a girl when she was really vulnerable, is ugly, a tool, doesn't really value himself because if I was dating my girl and she had sex with another guy it would have been over. A part of me question if the reason why he never talked to me before is because he was planning to get with her all along. Basically he got what he wanted because now they are official and dating in a time span of less than a month. What kinda irks me is that they probably had sex like first week in the break up because she was really vulnerable which probably added to her confused emotions for me.
As for me, I really learned alot from the relationship and really took the time to improve myself and become a better person. I'm not ready to date yet because I don't feel ready and am honestly afraid to be hurt again. The pain that I had to go through was really really painful, where it really debilitated me. I was able to get straight As at a good college during the break up which I'm proud of. Its been 2 months and half since the last break up now and right now there is no contact between either of us. I am a little bitter about everything that transpired though. My thoughts is that it is a rebound relationship and plus they are roommates so I don't think it will last, but I don't really put all my hopes on it. I just basically want to move on and get back to normal again.

So can I ask your guys opinion on everything that transpired? Whats your guys thoughts on their new relationship, whats your guys thoughts on those two people and myself? I know that we are both in the wrong and I would have preferred if we just took the time to evaluate what happened and learn from it instead of jumping immediately into another relationship, but people are different. Also could you guys tell me what you guys learned from the break ups? That would be very interesting and helpful.

[smackie9]

THERE IS WAY TOO MUCH TO READ>>>>please keep posts short and you will get better results.

[smackie9]

Ok I skimmed through it. She is 20 years old, she is an adult and she can screw, date, give hand jobs to or cuddle buddy anyone she wants. What she does is none of your business nor is it for you to judge. It's her life, if she wants to make a mess of it, then that is her problem and no one else's. Just leave it alone and worry about yourself.

Next, this is your first relationship...you will be needing to go through some more in order to learn enough about relationships. This is necessary for you in order to have a successful marriage in the future. You are only 20, you have a whole lot of other things that are way more important than this in your life to deal with. Focus on your education, and career, but also get with as many girls while you can for the experience, enjoy your freedom.