We've been together for a month.He told me at the beginning he loved me, but the same way he loves the world, recently he said he's not attracted to me, and he doesn't find me attractive, this is affective our sex life negatively (he doens't get very aroused by me) but he is not going to be the one to end the relationship he said, and that there is more to a relationship than sex(thank god). He said he doesn't believe in romantic love, but he does believe you can grow to love, be attracted to someone. He said he did find me attractive when we first met and when i wore a dress he liked. I want to stay with him, i feel very strongly about him, even though it hurts knowing this, and i can 'sense' it as well, but he is also holding back, he said, and i can feel that, but opening up i don't think will make him attracted to me.
We have a lot in common and he's not your average guy, not many girls would accept some parts of him. Personally, i find him attractive, but not terribly handsome. Anyway, any opinions would be great, and do you believe you can grow to love someone, to be attracted, sexually and romantically?(For me it was 'love at first sight', obviously not for him). Please help. I want to stay with him, but i don't know, because he's not attarcted and sex life is virtulally non existent, we're almost like friends. And he has a thing about kissing, he finds it annoying, but he doesn't mind kissing me on the cheek, but i can't kiss him, but he lets his dogs lick him all over his face!(i love dogs, but i find that kinda gross, kissing is more hygienic i think).Any advice would be great, thanks.
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26-11-09, 02:02 AM #1
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he said he's not attracted, but..
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26-11-09, 02:05 AM #2
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Why in gods name would you want to subject yourself to this? You're in a loveless relationship that's only going to get worse. Do yourself a favor and end it with this sociopath.
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26-11-09, 02:08 AM #3
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you have been together a month. Being physically and sexually attracted to your partner is a MAJOR part of any relationship.
He actually told you he is not attracted to you? what a loser. leave him.Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
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26-11-09, 02:40 AM #4
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Jeez, there are enough red flags in your relationship to choke a horse! Seriously, nothing is going to happen in that relationship. You sound a little insecure, and might be wishing a little to hard that the relationship will work, for fear of being alone. But being alone is better than the hell that kind of relationship is going to put you through.
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26-11-09, 08:34 AM #5
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Do you believe you are excellent, if he does not know how to cherish what you, he is stupid
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26-11-09, 10:27 AM #6
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Exactly WHY do you want to stay with him?
It sounds like a soul sucking, ego crushing nightmare of a relationship.
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26-11-09, 12:16 PM #7
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Why are you taking that crap from this guy? No one deserves to be treated like that. Dump the jerk and find someone who isn't mentally abusive and who sees you for both your inner and outer beauty. Trust me, he's out there. I was with a leech like him once too, and now I'm with a guy who tells me all the time how beautiful I am.
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26-11-09, 12:25 PM #8
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What everyone says is true. If you stay with him, years later, you will wish you could take it back. He is setting you up for greater and greater abuse. First, he strips you of value. Run... Forget about how you feel. Get out.
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27-11-09, 03:54 PM #9
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Only a month into your relationship, and he's already telling you he's not attracted? Wow... it's doomed to fail. The initial head over heels lustful attraction stage of a relationship usually lasts from 6 months to 2 years, so this is definitely atypical. Why is he staying in the relationship with you, exactly? And what do you like so much about him that keeps you trying for a guy who doesn't even find you attractive? What's so amazing about him?
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27-11-09, 06:55 PM #10
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Having feelings for someone who u know doesn't like you in the same way is horrible.
Read the advice given because it's correct. Whether you like it or not he's a jerk and despite you thinking this situation is better than being without him, thats not the case.
Someone out there is just waiting for the opportunity to date you.
Find happiness and don't settle for ANYTHING less. You deserve it, everyone does.
Originally Posted by qwerty123
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