hurting so much

[m1o9o9n0]

hurting so much
This is my predicament about three and a half years ago i met a wonderful woman we got on really well but the timing was wrong so we just stayed friends and i started a relationship with someone else but we started to meet up when i was in the area where she lived had wonderful nights together under the guise of working away, eventually we were missing each other so much i decided to end the relationship i was in which wasn’t really going anywhere as my feelings were so strong for this woman, that was 2 years ago for one and a half years we were inseparable I lived just 10 miles down the road and she would come over all the time. She had 2 kids who are 17 and 21 we all got on great. We decided that we would move in together 6 months ago i was truly in love and so was she everybody got on with everybody it felt fantastic.
I’m not saying we have not had our ups and downs in the 2 years as everyone does but 6 months down the line she told me that she doesn’t want a relationship anymore and has asked me to move out I am destroyed but her word is final, I love her so much we are still living together with her kids till I move out in 3 weeks it’s been 6 weeks since she told me to go
The reasons are she isn’t ready for a relationship she has become so cold and just wants her kids around her, I get upset but she just tells me to get over it and move on.. I can’t believe for how close we were that this could happen. I don’t know how to feel or what to feel I just go to work then come home and sit upstairs on the bed absolutely distraught. She just doesn’t seem to care and is heavily into planning her sons secret 18th birthday party inviting all her friends some I never even got to meet .. I have always been there for her she has been through alot in the last 3 years and i stuck by her but now i feel used and hurt

[just-me]

I'm in somewhat similar situation now. The biggest difference is that in my case there are no kids involved and we were together for 5 years. One thing I know for sure, she loved me unconditionally for at least first 3-4 years.
Then she found another guy and dumped me out of blue She said it was coming for a while and she doesn't feel the same, but honestly I didn't see it coming and it seems more like she's just found someone else who made her happy at the moment.
Ever since she's been acting cold, maybe too cold I'd say and it seems as though she's just trying her best to deal with her own feelings. It seems like its just her defense mechanism. Maybe some woman can give more input on this because it just doesn't make any sense. I mean, how can someone just forget everything and act like it never happened? Of course you cannot feel the same love and passion after 5 years like you did in the beginning of the relationship, but that will eventually happen with every future relationship. Butterflies will go away and the only alternative is either to stay with person who is 100% committed to you and you have so much in common, or keep looking for that initial thrill and excitement until you're 50 years old, all alone and then just marry some random guy so you can have someone by your side when you need him.

What you need to do is get out! Try to have some fun, hang out with friends, meet new women and most importantly think positive about yourself. There is nothing you can do about her decision and feeling sorry for yourself is not gonna make her want you back. If you show her how strong you are, she might realize what she's lost, maybe now, maybe months or years down the road.
Read my thread "22 days later" if you wanna see how am I dealing with it. Just realizing that I can make other woman laugh and get them interested in me made me feel a lot better. Yeah, my feelings are still strong but I know she's most likely gone for good and if she ever comes back I'm not sure I'd be ready to go through all this again.
One thing I've learned in last few weeks is that if she sees you as a weak person, a loser, she will never come back. If you show her how strong you are (even if you're really not) you may stand a chance.

good luck