Torn Apart

[Friarage Girl]

Why does the pain get worse each day? it's eating me alive :'(

[stan92964]

It probably isn't getting worse each day. You live in the now and the pain you feel now is fresh. The pain of your loss is stronger than your memory of yesterday.
So, what happened anyway? ...

[anxietywart]

its the worst kind of pain that one, especially when all you feel like you feel is that. You can't escape it and its almost suffocating. I'm hoping it will gradually leave as the common cliche suggests 'time is the biggest healer'

[stan92964]

You are right … time heals, but many years ago when I was feeling like you described … people would tell me, “time will heal” and that didn’t help me at all.

One day I joined a divorce recovery group, and before it started, I was talking to the counselor who was to lead the group … she looked me in the eye and told me I was going to get through this and I would be fine. It wasn’t the words but the conviction in her tone of voice that told me she had been through this pain, and she knew.

She was right … I have a wife and a teen- aged daughter that I love with all my heart. We have the kind of relationship that most everyone wants … so, yes, you will get through this and life will be good again … and, yes, it will take time … but it will happen.

[anxietywart]

Im happy it has worked well for you and you have that peace with your family. It is true what your saying, i find it extremely difficult to open up to friends even though they have been through similar things. They tell me the things everybody says, you will heal and you will get through this. But sometimes, it doesn't feel you will. Don't get me wrong iv been trying for a year now to get myself on track, remember me and work on me. But i still have those days like today when i think and i re-live hurt and make my days harder almost for myself to bear. You do need somebody with conviction to reassure you that it will be okay but everyday can be a struggle. Hardest thing is repairing a broken heart.

I hope i get to enjoy what you have been blessed with one day.

[anxietywart]

in fact i hope all get to enjoy it, its a blessing of course obtained through struggle. But a blessing.

[Friarage Girl]

Today is just really bad and it feel's like i am slowly going to die but i know one day it wll be better and maybe than i can get an answer.

[chrismay]

Well! Positive people attract other people. How about getting back up again and giving it one more try?

[Friarage Girl]

Well that is what i am going to do just taken it one day at a time.

[chrismay]

Excellent

[stan92964]

There is no way to describe the pain you are going through … I know. I could not function for months and lost my job because of it. I don’t remember exactly when I felt better because it was so gradual. I was single for 4 years before I found Natalia who brings me the happiness I enjoy today. We have been married for 11 years now. I dated a lot but couldn’t get my heart into it for a long time but even just dating was good for me. I didn’t think I could love like that again, but I did. Be patient with yourself.

[Friarage Girl]

Thank you for them wonderful words because that is how i feel,like i can't love again except him,he was my everything and now i feel empty.
The tears seem to never stop at the moment.

[SayJay]

In order to get over him, you have to always look forward. You can not have the misconception that he was 'the one', but rather believe that there is someone else out there better for you; because there is. Right now you feel empty, but you just have to enjoy being single again, enjoy hanging out with friends, the excitement of meeting someone new, finding new interests that you didn't know you had. You might begin to look for qualities that matched your ex's, but that is not what you are actually looking for, you are going to have to realize that he had qualities you liked, but there are other qualities in other people that you did not know existed that you will love. So keep your head up, and always look forward; believe it will happen for you =).

[Friarage Girl]

Thank you!
That is very true but for now i am just taking it one day at a time and than with that time it will get much better.

[Lissy0404]

I wonder the same, I broke up with the man I love 3 days ago, and I feel that I'm living in hell. I think of him all the time, and look my phone hopping he calls. The funny thing is I know how terrible bad he was to me. I was kind, and sweet, and love him deeply. Still he cheat, and make me cry more often than he make me smile. People keeps giving me advice how to forget, I guess time heals everything. I try to think of all the good things I have in life, and try to see the positive side of everything.