How do I pick you up?

[Cosmo]

I've read all the 'player tips' that are out on the net, but how does a lady want to be picked up. What do you respond to?

We're talking bar scenarios and every day scenarios here.


I've been out of the 'game' for so long I don't have any idea on what to do.


... by the way, be honest. What has someone said that has made you give them your number/make out. I say that because I think its actually easier to get a mid 20 year old to make out with you at the bar then to get them to give you their number (probably because she has a man at home).

I don't want a relationship, I don't want to get laid. I just want some female company, test the waters, go from there.

... My friends are making fun of me. Women always approach me in shopping centers and what not and initiate conversations with me at the bars... then I have no idea what to do and they lose interest. Whereas my friends are ugly as hell and a girl has never picked them out of a crowd, yet they're leaving with girls and they don't want to do anything but bang them. I actually want to get to know these girls, and I get nothing lol.

[bloodtippedrose]

come to think of it I only give guys numbers out of pity
when guys are confident and ask for my number straight off then I rudely blow them off
but when guys are meek and embarrassed I give them my number...
rare is the occasion I give my number and WANT too, when that happens the guy has proven to me that hes laid back, smart, funny and interested

seriously dont listen to me I am not fu(king normal...

[dewilliams2]

Seriously don't use any lines....just be yourself. Introduce yourself, be funny but not over the top intentionally funny. Like don't throw out a knock knock joke.

If things seem like they are going in a good direction at a bar, offer to buy a drink.

Its not rocket science, its just conversation and maybe that conversation leads somewhere and maybe it doesn't but genearlly talking isn't a totally miserable experience....so just relax and enjoy yourself.

I know I'm a guy and you wanted females opinions but I think your over thinking things.

[Mish]

If you want the truth then start to accept that there is no game and the player tips are just confidence boosters and nothing more. They are used to sell books and for "motivation".

If you are looking to get to know women, then you are looking in the wrong places. People don't go to bars and clubs to get to know each other. Pick up some classes of something that interests you, like dancing and there you'll have lots of girls to choose from that you can talk to and get to know.

[xxazurexx]

It was never what they may have said, that made me want to hand over my number. I aint that easily pleased.
It was to do with whether I was attracted to the guy. As in liking the 'overall' package.
So very very few guys, have ever got my number and because I tend to be fussy...too fussy actually.

[girl68]

way too much booze. but in those cases your a seed of deep regret.

say something funny about something random that's happening in the current situation. pick up the conversation from there.

I've never really had a guy "pick me up" where I was actually interested. Well there was once... and he was a major player and all the girls flocked him and that ain't my style.

[lanana.banana]

bars and clubs are not the right place.. unless theyre the sober one of their friends. keep it casual, and be interested in them, keep the conversation going at all costs. buy then a soda or something, and say that it was a pleasure tlaking to them, and you would like to maybe see them again. then just give them your phone, and say put your number in there so i know where to find you. then wink.
that would work for me.
as long as you didnt come off arogant
but if you're posting on this site then you most likely dont have that problem
x

[newyork09]

There are really 2 things that will distinguish you from every other guy in that bar.

One is that you are genuine - I know it sounds stupid, but don't try and be somebody you're not. Your friends are different people to you, so don't try to be them. Meeting guys would be boring if they were all the same! And besides, it is so easy to tell if a guy is trying to be someone they're not.

Two is be confident. This goes hand in hand with the first. Definitely build on your confidence, because it sounds like you're lacking it. It sounds as if you don't believe that you are interesting enough, or funny enough, or attractive enough or whatever to just attract a woman's attention. But this is never true, and you need to realize it in order to succeed - this is the secret. Every single one of the guys that I've met AND maintained an interest for in clubs or bars has had this in common. They've all been different: some more attractive, some less, some tall, some short, some thin, some stocky. But all of them have been confident, whether it's in terms of having a razor sharp sense of humour or whether they're just the life and soul of the party. If you can show a woman that you're sure of yourself, and up for having a good time, this is possibly the most attractive quality to have.

[Taragirlie21]

Yeah, don't come up like the jersey shore guys "hey baby " , how about you just act normal , lol

[bluesummer]

I'd like to point out that too many men read confidence and portray it as 'ego'. They are not the same thing. Acting cocky isn't attractive, being comfortable in your own skin IS.

The only guys I have ever let talk to me are the ones that seem easygoing, the ones that look like they'd talk to anybody because they're friendly. If they can joke around, be real, I'll have a conversation with them. If they seem genuine and interesting and NOT sleazy, I would be receptive to an invite to meet up again.....as long as they made it seem like it was a casual get together and not a potential hook-up scenario.

The ones that don't work......walking up and buying me a drink. Telling me I'm hot/beautiful/attractive/have nice eyes. Blech. Cheesy pick-up lines. Invites to go out drinking or partying. Getting all up in my personal space....or going so far as to actually touch me. Yuck.