SOS...What is this guy thinking....if anything?

[astrild]

This is a long story I am going to attempt to make a short one so bear with me.

Here is a brief synopsis:

A new guy was hired by my company about a year ago. He was dating a girl at the time he was hired and over time he started flirting with me via text...nothing inappropriate just trying to check to see if I was interested kind of thing. I reciprocated and eventually he broke up with his girlfriend and pursued me. Here is the kicker...I am the boss (not just of him, but the big boss). We actually had a date to just discuss the possibility of dating and what the consequences of doing so might be. We had a very open conversation where I very frankly told him what I was looking for and he did the same. So, we started dating and had a lot of fun together. We are both very type A driven personalities, so we knew it was going to either be very, very good or very, very bad. It seemed to be very, very good. It amped up and he was to the point where he wanted to see me every day (even if it was just stopping by to hang out with me for 30 minutes at work after everyone else had gone home). After about 2 weeks of this constant attention, he took an about face and backed way off. At this point, it was kind of on again, off again for about 4 months. The game seemed to be...him backing off, me breaking it off telling him I was looking for something more reliable, and then him returning for more. This lasted for about 4 months until he invited me on a trip with him to visit friends from his hometown. I thought the trip went well, his friends seemed to like me and we had a lot of fun but the whole time he just kept saying, "don't get attached...don't get attached" to which I just replied ok, ok.

We got back from the trip and I didn't hear from him at all until about 4 days later after a company softball game. I was at the game and left without acknowledging him...yes I know my bad...but I wasn't sure if it was interested since he hadn't contacted me since we had gotten back and I wanted to play it cool. Anyway, after the game I got a text that said "don't think I can do this anymore...I'm tired of everyone commenting on every aspect of our relationship". Trying to act like I didn't care I simply responded, "that's cool we both know the trip was just for fun anyway".

Next thing I know, he was back to dating the girl he was first dating when he was first hired. (This girl is the opposite of myself, financially unstable, an emotional wreck, not put together, aka a woman in need of rescuing) I took it in stride and continued to act professionally and we continued on business as usual.

Here is where it gets interesting....4 days ago I get a text from him saying "this may be weird but I was wondering if your ear was still available for a piece of advice", so I responded "sure what's up". At this point, he called and said that he wanted to know what the best way was to break up with girlfriend # 1 without hurting her and looking like a bad guy. We talked about 45 minutes... I gave him very general platonic advice never addressing our relationship, letting him know that I was honored that he respected me enough to ask for my opinion. Work continued at usual...I did not bring it up again or tell anyone at work what I knew.

Now last night here is a glimpse of our conversation:

Him: Well it sure didn't go well like I planned.
Me: Sorry...hold your head up it would have made you a bad guy if you would've lead her on even longer
Him: Want to meet up
Me: Sure
(hours of texting regarding where and when), then...
Him: I'm actually heading home, maybe another time
Me: Speechless
Him: I'm in my driveway...wanna come over?
Me: Sounded like a good idea, until you started involving emotions and games, you kinda took the fun out of it now
Him: I'm good...have a good weekend....
Me: Whatever.
Him: I'm at home climbing into bed...have a good weekend.
Me: No response

What is this about? Does he want me or not? Have any of you been in a similar situation from either a girl or guy point of view?

I really do like him and haven't felt a stronger connection with anyone else over the past 3 years of being single and I don't even really know if he is interested in me at all or just using me up as he sees fit. Any ideas as to what his behavior shows would be appreciated. (Btw I was really not that attracted to him in the beginning, but he kinda grew on me). Normally I would consider myself out of his league, but his bright mind and driven personality keeps bringing me back to him in my head. I think we could be a great team but we are both so stubborn I don't know if we can ever be honest at the same time and make it happen.

[regdenied]

Don't screw your staff. Best advice I can give you.

[AnnonymousMan]

This is sort of humorous to me because it reminds me of situations in my own life.

He either got with you at the start due to rebound or to gain something his x couldn't satisfy him with. He also could of got with you because he legit cared about you. To figure out if he did legit care about you, how involved was he when it came to your emotions or him listening when you confided in him?

He could of brought you on the trip as a status symbol. I know with me, having an attractive girl or a girl with you boosts your own ego or makes you feel more like 'the man' compared to other guys. You must not annoy him to bad if he actually brought you though since he had the opportunity to hangout with old friends. I know most guys want 'alone' time with there male friends.

As for his 'yes and no' routine it sounds like he is either unsure or he is useing you. If he did care about you and liked you he wouldn't keep you at a distance, knowing another guy could take you away. My guess is that he is useing you for his own benefit or he finds it weird that your his boss and knows the relationship could never ammount to anything so it feels like he is playing games with your head.