Is it ok to look at another person when ur in love and in a relationship?

[mjb]

Hi, I have been curious for sometime now in understanding the above. I have a frienf who has been married for 11 years. In the last few years they have very little sex life and no affection. His wife has told him that she is happy with a sexless marriage and does not require afection.
He is a very emotional and affectionate man and quite passionate about their relationship.He came to the conclusion that she only loved him as a friend therefore that would explain her lack of desire for him. They are in there mid forties and the wife is currently going through menopause.
It was a bout a year ago that his wife had gone to do some shopping and had gone for coffee at a coffee shop nearby. the husband did not think much of this until, the next time that the wife had gone back to the same coffee shop and taken a friend and stated to the friend that they needed to go and have coffee at this particular place because there was a hot looking guy working there.The wife went on to remark about his body and his looks making referance to celebrity which she has always thought to be gorgeous.
When it all came out the wife attempted to change what had occurred and offer diffrent excuses. This till day there has been major problems in that marriage and the husband no longer trusts his wife . He now believes that his wife would be quite capable of sleeping with other men and also thinks that she is always looking at others . He feels extremely betrayed.

[xxazurexx]

I'm a bit confused and because the title of your thread is 'Is it ok to look at another person and when you are in love and in a relationship'.

In that instance I'd say it was ok to look and admire....so long as you are not 'touching'.

But the woman you are referring to and distrusting, is in a relationship with you, yes.... but she doesn't appear to be 'in love' with you. You have accepted that and chose to settle for a 'friends' relationship with your partner and a 'sexless' relationship.

So perhaps the title of the thread should be 'Is it ok to look at another person and when your relationship has become nothing more than 'friends''?... perhaps?

And I aint gonna comment, because I don't know what to think of that situation and I've never been in it.

You know, sometimes people just lose their desire for a person, but that doesn't mean that they don't or wouldn't desire others.
A lot of people would desire someone, but they are also people who wouldn't 'act' on these desires.
I see great looking guys with fit bodies all the time, but I tend to admire them from afar rather than chase them around. So it could be she is just admiring a handsome guy, as you would admire an attractive woman, ya know.

[skywatcher79]

90% that wife is cheating on him.
Tell your friend to "look around" and enjoy life while he can.
And to read on Wikipedia about menopause.

[xxazurexx]

^ I don't think I'd go as high as 90%.

Thing is and if she had anything to hide, she would have kept this guy secret. But instead, she chose to tell her hubby about him.

[Gigabitch]

I suppose looking is just something that happens, but going home to tell your husband about it, the husband you don't have an intimate relationship with, is just cruel. What the hell is wrong with this awful, awful woman?