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Thread: mixed signals

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    1

    mixed signals

    Hi all. I have a situation which is really bugging me. I signed up for one of the online dating sites and matched with an intriguing lady. We have been progressing through the communication process, though she has been sending mixed signals. I sent her a message a week ago and have not received any response. This is the 2nd time she has not responded to me. The first time I wrote inquiring if everything was ok, which she responded to that she had been busy. We messaged a few times after that, and she wrote the longest message she had written yet to me (her last message). But most of these messages seem rather guarded and she doesn't seem to ask any questions about me.

    I can't tell if she has no real interest in me and only responds occasionally just to be nice, or if she is afraid to open up and has a fear of getting hurt. The reason I think she is afraid is from her profile and a close-ended question she sent me. The close-ended question was about how my previous relationships ended, ie that she is afraid about getting hurt badly. Additionally, she seems to lack some self-confidence in who she is, and indicated in her profile about having some bad past experiences that has hurt her confidence in who she is.

    At this point, I am not sure how to proceed. Do I just forget about her and maybe message her if she ever writes back? Or do I send a message asking directly about her interest in a relationship and maybe explore her feelings some? Or is there a third option I should explore?

    Thanks for any help!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Bottom Of A Well
    Posts
    255
    Its kinda hard to figure out things from text... There's a lot that's lost in the translation when you communicate through email/im/etc which we seem to do more often now. You can't read her and ponder and anticipate...

    Send her a message and tell her how a random day went. But from my experiences, girls with confidence and self esteem issues are ones you need to be careful about, just becareful if you do intend to pursue it. But after you send her the message, it's all up to her. But consider this, how busy are you where you can't send a message, send an im, pick up the phone and say I can't talk, but I just wanted to call and say hi?

    Guys and girls, when was the last time you Didn't change your plans when you met someone that really perked your interest?

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