Broken Heart over Ex-Girlfriend

[jerseyfire24]

PLEASE HELP!!!

I am 39 year old male and ex gf is the same age. We both went to high school together but didnt really talk. We found each other 2 years ago talking on Facebook and then meeting in person. We both fell in love with each other. We have been together for 20 months before she wanted a break. She has twin boys and I have 2 boys as well. She just finalized her divorce an has been living with her mom and sons. I am starting to go through a divorce to be with her. Over the 20 months we went out to dinner etc... She would get upset over my wife posting pics on facebook and I would reassure her there was nothing I could do, its not my account and its not what it seems. We were at 2 different stages of divorce. In Sept we had a fantastic night out and the weekend i spent with family. She told me in Oct she needed a break and felt numb and distant because she felt nothing was going to happen. When we came together, we said that we would be together, may take time but in the end we will be together. She knew and understood my positon and never pushed stating take your time. I told a friend at work that after the holidays, I was going to start divorce papers, pay off credit cards and look into buying a house. I thought I told her this as well but apparently just told co-worker. When she wanted break in Oct. she stated she felt differently and didnt think it was going to happen. She still loves me and has feelings for me but was afraid about the future with my kids. I told her we cant predict the future adn I will be there for them when needed. Well in Oct she wanted that break. I tried to talk to her about going back out to date again. In November, she started talking to a guy we both know, who like me is very nice. But we dont look alike at all. He is close to 300lbs and bald. I was 265 and lost 50lbs over the course of us dating and have hair lol. I know he was there to comfort her and spend time with her when I was at home with my kids. But she knew that I was starting marriage counseling and getting ball rolling to what we both wanted. She told me and I believe her 100% they are hanging out and talking thats it. He is seperated, not divorced yet and lives with mom and has a 16yr old daughter. She tells me she is not in love with him and that they like hanging out. We text each other thoughout the day, everyday and she still confesses that she still loves me and has feelings for me that she has never felt before. and that the only reason why we broke up was my situation at home that was about to change after holidays anyways. He knows that she still loves me and has feelings for me and that I have the same for her, and we never fought etc. just ended over my situation. She told me she likes him and he as well as her want to see if this will work. That she wants to respect the fact that they both like each other and have some of same interests. My kids and her kids always want to get together and play.
How do I get her back?? I believe she has those feelings for me because I talk to her friends. He is spending time with her where i couldnt at this time.
Will I EVER get her back?
What do I do??
PLEASE HELP!!!!

[Sonrisa]

does your wife know about her?

[jerseyfire24]

My wife and I agreed on a divorce, she knows that it is her.

[Sonrisa]

how are you feeling about leaving the mother of your children?

[jerseyfire24]

We have agreed to seperate. I love her but we dont have that type of intimacy relationship anymore.

[jerseyfire24]

Can anyone give me some advice?

[alwaystryin]

I told a friend at work that after the holidays, I was going to start divorce papers, pay off credit cards and look into buying a house. I thought I told her this as well but apparently just told co-worker.

Need clarification before advice. You're both leaving your partners to be with each other and you FORGOT to speak to HER of your plans? And why marriage counseling if you're getting a divorce? Maybe you're sending her mixed signals. I know I'm a little confused...

[lexilovestoread]

talk to her from time to time and make your intentions clear. then as soon as you've settled with your divorce then that's the time that you can work hard on getting her back if you really love her. right now, your children needs you to be there for them. I'm sure you know that they are also having a hard time with both of their parents not being together anymore.