i really need some help...falling out of love?

[aliens]

Okay, I really need some help on this. My girlfriend and I have been together for almost one year. We have been through so increadibly much and have actually never even had a fight (which could be both good and bad). Well, about a month ago we went on summer break (we're in college) and she lives about 3 hours away from me (and seeing as my car broke down...we've only seen eachother like once). But before the break she was apparantly starting to feel like things were becoming weird between the two of us. I guess she started to lose the feelings of love that we once had and over this time that we haven't been able to be together, her feelings of lost love have only become more inhanced. So, now we are trying to figure out if she still truly loves me...but how do we figure that out? I know that she still cares for me desperately...but that feeling of love has since been lost. Anyone have any ideas? I am the first genuinly nice guy she has ever dated (she's only been with real creeps) and the last thing she wants to do is string me along. This situation is tearing both of us apart.
Thanks for the help.

[clynn]

Will you both be back at school and living in the same location in a few months?

Distance sometimes does this to people.

[aliens]

yeah, in the beginning of august we will both be back up at school...we pretty much live with eachother except we do have our own places too.
but then how do we get through the next five weeks without things going sour?

[GrkScorp]

don't stress over it. easy for me to say since i'm not losing anyone here..

however, if you take a look at divorce law, people that are married for under 1 year and get divorced have no fear of asset division if there are no children.

the reason to this law is because it is scientifically proven that the "lovespell" the two new lovers feel, goes away after 6months-1.5years. So for better of for worst, 1 year was put into law as a sort of average.

this is why it's a good idea to wait at least 6 months before you pop the question, and well over a year or even two, until you start having kids.

back you your problemo..

we all feel like that sometimes. not just girls, not just guys.. not just new couples, not just older ones.. WE ALL FEEL LIKE THAT..

one minute we're deeply in love and side by side, the next you are thinking of how you're going to cover up your partner's body so that the cops can't trace it back to you..

we feel like we're disconnected, apart, lost interest, bored, confused...

thankfully there's good news.. and it doesn't start with "Z" and end with "oloft".

i'm talking about understanding what is going on.. when someone tells you that they are confused, that is like telling you that they have a problem, but it stops there. YOU!!! need to find out what that problem is.. don't wait for it to grow until you start caring.

You need to call, TALK.. and seriously listen in on what you are both doing wrong.

Here comes the win-win situation.. best case scenario, you argue a little bit, make up, and everything is lovey duvey again..

worst case, you argue a little bit more, and end up on your own seperate ways. (think about it.. you have the chace to find someone who doesn't live 3 hours away and that will love you again!!!)

but.. it's still up to you.. to LISTEN AND TALK, or to SIT AND WAIT.. (CALL HER!!)

[clynn]

Just let it be for the time being.

Don't stress about it.

It is only 5 weeks.

I think since she is the one who is cooling off in her emotions, it would be wise for you to suggest that the two of have a break. Let it be your suggestion, and stick with it. Us girls us like what we can't have a little bit more.

By the time you are ready for school to start up again.........then you'll know better. In the meantime, you're both free to meet and date others, if you want.

If you come back together in August and you both still want to be together ---- you'll be stronger because of it.

You know - the whole setting the bird free thing!

[vashti]

I agree with clynn.

[Gigabitch]

She needs some attention. Don't stifle her (which shouldn't be too hard, since you're apart for the summer), but you should go and see her. When she wants to know if you're worried about things getting weird, say no, it's just because you missed her.

Then have a really nice, casual day of hanging out together. You need to remind her what she's got to come back to in 5 weeks.