Trying to become more social

[converging]

Hey guys, haven't posted on here in a little bit. But I'm trying to become more social and meet more people. I currently go to college and work part time and have some great friends, however im looking to meet more people maybe meet a nice girl too. Any tips on starting up conversation with people you don't know or maybe you often see around school or coming into your work? I get very nervous with this kind of stuff and any help would be appreciated. Thanks!

[MetalPhoenix]

Hey guys, haven't posted on here in a little bit. But I'm trying to become more social and meet more people. I currently go to college and work part time and have some great friends, however im looking to meet more people maybe meet a nice girl too. Any tips on starting up conversation with people you don't know or maybe you often see around school or coming into your work? I get very nervous with this kind of stuff and any help would be appreciated. Thanks!

Try to find something you and the other person have in common (hobby's for instance). It's easy to talk about something you both like...

[dewilliams2]

^^^common interests are always good...I meet a lot of people through common friends....I don't like all of them but every now and then I'll be introduced to a person I like...tell your friends you'd like to meet some of their other friends.

[lahnnabell]

Join a sports club, or some other sort of extracurricular activity if you haven't already. It gives you plenty to talk about with people you might already be somewhat familiar with.

[Incognito]

I used to be deathly afraid to talk to new people when I was around 17-18, yet I wanted to meet a nice girl. I actually had to take a drug for social anxiety disorder, but it "helps" not cures the problem. Anyway I just MADE myself talk to people until it affected me less and less. Believe me I thought I was going to shit myself the first few months that I used the "bite the bullet and do it" approach, but eventually (as with everything) I became desensitized. You will too after both meeting a few women and being rejected a few times.

[the_robot]

What about how to start a conversation with someone you don't know?

[Petit Papillon]

Just start a convo. When I was at the uni, a girl started the conversation with me asking where did I buy mu bag,cause she liked it After she introduced me to other people she already knew and so it started
This is just example. For example ,sitting in a classroom next to a person you would like to talk to, say some comment about a teacher or class subject
There is sooo many ways to talk to people. You can start conversations with plenty of subjects. I can't imagine it being something difficult to do Unless you're not confident . Then, the question is not 'how to start the conversation' but 'how to become more confident'

[the_robot]

There is sooo many ways to talk to people. You can start conversations with plenty of subjects. I can't imagine it being something difficult to do Unless you're not confident . Then, the question is not 'how to start the conversation' but 'how to become more confident'

I think I'm going to start a thread about that

[the_robot]

Just start a convo. When I was at the uni, a girl started the conversation with me asking where did I buy mu bag,cause she liked it After she introduced me to other people she already knew and so it started
This is just example. For example ,sitting in a classroom next to a person you would like to talk to, say some comment about a teacher or class subject

I saw a cute girl in the subway this morning, thought of telling her something but didn't know what to... I ended up racing her to the university...

[Petit Papillon]

If by racing, you mean following her - that sounds creepy,my dear. I don't know what you could tell her either, I never found it interesting when guys were talking to be in the bus or on the street, so for example no matter what you would say to me, I would have leave it without a comment and just keep on walking

[the_robot]

If by racing, you mean following her - that sounds creepy,my dear. I don't know what you could tell her either, I never found it interesting when guys were talking to be in the bus or on the street, so for example no matter what you would say to me, I would have leave it without a comment and just keep on walking

No, I was walking my way but it turns out we were going to the same place, both walking really fast (I wasn't doing it on purpose, I just walk fast). But yes, I thought telling her something would have had that effect...

[MikeL]

No, I was walking my way but it turns out we were going to the same place, both walking really fast (I wasn't doing it on purpose, I just walk fast). But yes, I thought telling her something would have had that effect...

lol you are a fast walker like me too, huh? lol every try to slow your walking speed down with anyone else male or female? lol it's painful

But to stay on topic I still have a little issue with being social since I've always been a pretty private person I don't speak much unless I knew you for awhile.

[the_robot]

lol you are a fast walker like me too, huh? lol every try to slow your walking speed down with anyone else male or female? lol it's painful

But to stay on topic I still have a little issue with being social since I've always been a pretty private person I don't speak much unless I knew you for awhile.

lol, it's impossible most of the time...

About being private, I am like that too, but if you talk about something non-personal it may be easier... not like I have tried

[MikeL]

for me I just get really shy if I see a beautiful girl

[Incognito]

I was once where you were, and like I said women typically take shyness for weakness. The way that I overcame this was to just introduce myself and start talking. I always observe people before I approach them so that I could figure out if they were single or not and what type of mood they are in. Back in the day if I saw a woman who was attractive (not uber-attractive, because most of them tended to be materialistic or stuck up), and she seemed to be in a good mood I'd force myself to go up to her and talk. I won't lie to you......you will get shot down for a while because your insecurity will be noticible. However, once you realize that rejection won't kill you you'll stop caring so much about being rejected. Once you stop caring about that you'll have more confidence, and it will show.