So this girl I met is either a serious FREAK, or she's all talk.

[Dogtoast]

Alright, some of you might remember my thread " i think i ruined my chances" where I talk about a girl I've been chasing for a while now. First night we met, we made out which wasn't a big deal. We talked and texted back and forth for about a month, and finally hung out again on Friday.

I took her out to a nice dinner followed by some drinks and after we were pretty drunk she starts opening up to me. She told me she wants to continue seeing me and she's into me etc. I agreed as I want to continue seeing her as well. She also asked me that if we're going to see each other, she wanted to know if I would be upset if she made out with and possibly hooked up with other girls. Immediately upon hearing this, the idea of any sort of serious relationship with this girl exited my head. ALTHOUGH, I did say no it would not bother me, as long as I was involved. I'm no idiot.

She then said that would be absolutely fine, but there is one stipulation, I have to pay more attention to her than to the other girl. She mentioned her best friends name who I know she's really close with. She even went as far as to say she'd really like to bring 2 other girls into the mix. I said that is quite alright. She said she's never had sex with a girl, but has hooked up with them. Keep in mind we are making out like our plane was going down at the bar in between breaks in this conversation. Classy, I know.

She also told me how she has not had sex in about a year and is "really super horny." I didn't believe her about how long its been, still dont. I asked her if she wanted to go back to my place and she declined. She wasn't shocked or upset at me asking this, she just said how she likes me, but she's not easy. Whatever, thats fine.

One weird thing she did was explain to me how clean she apparently is, like in regards to not having std's. She went on to tell me that if she knows how the guy she's dating is clean...she'll "do anything.....I mean anything." That doesnt make sense because what can you not do with a condom that you can without? Anyways she proceeded to explain her obsession with cleanliness was because she caught the clap from some dude in highschool. Why did she fu*king tell me this? I have no idea.

I took her home and she said how much fun she had and invited me to go to the Daytona 500 with her mom and her moms boyfriend on Valentines day.

Now I ask you, the amazingly insightful bunch on LF....what the hell is going on here?!?!?!?

[Peter Pry]

She's a woman who enjoys sex. I fail to see your problem here. I fail to see how the boundary of no-making-out-with-girls-without-me makes you "not an idiot," but *shrug.*

You think it's weird that she is discussing her STD situation with you? That is basic safe sex 101.

You sound like a sex-negative boy who has met a girl in the sex-positive culture where the talk about sex preferences, boundaries, and safe sex is expected to come very early in the relationship. If sex talk makes you uncomfortable, then perhaps a more prudish girl is more your style. Try the churches and bible study groups in your area.

[Dogtoast]

She's a woman who enjoys sex. I fail to see your problem here. I fail to see how the boundary of no-making-out-with-girls-without-me makes you "not an idiot," but *shrug.*

You think it's weird that she is discussing her STD situation with you? That is basic safe sex 101.

You sound like a sex-negative boy who has met a girl in the sex-positive culture where the talk about sex preferences, boundaries, and safe sex is expected to come very early in the relationship. If sex talk makes you uncomfortable, then perhaps a more prudish girl is more your style. Try the churches and bible study groups in your area.

I don't have a problem with any of it! I was just very thrown off by how up front she was about everything because of how early in the relationship it is, and it made me dismiss her as a possible SERIOUS relationship. I'm definitely not sex negative, and I'm not sure how much the U.S. is "sex positive". The US is kinda behind the rest of the world as far as open sexuality is concerned. Maybe thats why I'm so taken aback by this!

[Peter Pry]

Well, no, the US is not sex-positive at all, as demonstrated by your characterization of a sexual woman with the epithet "freak". In cultures (or subcultures) in which sex is fully accepted as a healthy and positive part of an adult life, it is generally expected that this discussion happens as early as possible, certainly before the first, er... encounter. This gives you the opportunity to set your own safe sex rules and boundaries and express your discomfort with anything that is likely to happen.

[tufty]

i agree with everything posted above but to be honest if you switch the story around and say it was the guy saying all that on what was essentially a 'first date' i would definately be freaking out right about now!

but then again - i am british....