My girlfriend likes someone else.

[Toxic106]

As simple as the title. My girlfriend likes someone else she said. And she still likes me she said. She started liking this guy last week....... I... I don't know what to think. I completely understand that you can't control who you like. So... I wouldn't blame her for liking someone else. The truth is though... this really hurts.

This is my first relationship. I love her dearly. She says she doesn't know what she wants anymore. What can I do? To be honest, I wouldn't mind if she likes someone else and break up with me. I said, I wouldn't mind, but it will still hurt. I'm sure of it. Though her happiness comes first. She's really stuck at the moment. I don't know how I can help. I really don't. I'm waaaaay too inexperienced in this department. We've been going out for almost 2 months btw. She says this will keep happening. I don't know what else I can do but to be with her until she figures this out.

I truly, do love her. All I want is for her to be happy. Is there ANY way, any way at all, that can help her with her feelings and stuff? I know the chance if having a way would be quite slim but... anyone?

[Gigabitch]

Tox, "I don't mind" sounds like "I don't care". You see this, right?

[Toxic106]

Thanks for pointing that out, I honestly didn't notice that. Seriously, I didn't. Thanks.

[BackUpOrGetStng]

Break it off with her and go no contact. Tell her to get in touch with you if she decides you're the one she really wants to be with. She'll probably come crawling back within a couple days. If not, you still have your dignity and you'll already have begun healing.

[xxazurexx]

There isn't a great lot you can do and when they say they don't know what they want anymore and they like someone else, other than to let her go and let her be free and to figure it all out herself.
Waste of time trying to figure someone out, who can't even figure themselves out.

Perhaps you should end things now and before she ends it with you....which is no doubt on the cards. When you end it with her, she will get a taste of what rejection feels like, which is what you are experiencing now.

[VincenzoG91]

Break it off with her and go no contact. Tell her to get in touch with you if she decides you're the one she really wants to be with. She'll probably come crawling back within a couple days. If not, you still have your dignity and you'll already have begun healing.

I would skip the part where you tell her that you will be her backup plan. Break it off, go no contact, and move on. If (when) she decides to contact you later, decide then how you feel about it.

[RdHrshyKss]

dump her. tell her to give you a call if she has a change of heart and you'll let her if you're interested. 2 months is a short period of time. i don't think you could accurately conclude that you love someone that quickly. if you hold on while she's contemplating her options, it makes you look like a wuss that she can use how she pleases. i wouldn't be surprised if she gave you the "let's take a break" option, where you guys aren't really broken up, but you aren't together, so that she could go and test the waters with this other guy. if it works out, she'll dump you for good, if it doesn't she'll come back to you and try to pretend like nothing happened. don't be a doormat. take control of this situation. it's a monogamous relationship or nothing. break up with her and move on. if she ends up wanting to get back with you, at least you've elicited some control and no tolerance for mind games.

[Kaius]

Don't be so passive man! Girls step all over guys who are passive. Why would you want to be with someone who will always constantly look elsewhere. If she really likes you, she would not even notice anyone more attractive than you.
Clearly she doesn't feel the same way that you feel about her. Why would you put her happiness above yours? Break it off, and don't look back. She's not worth it.

[iHEARTu]

Not sure what to say. I'm like that as well. And frankly my bf just goes "meh, i trust you. you wouldnt be a bitch anyway" <- meaning i wouldnt cheat on him. and that makes me happy. so tell her that you trust her and stuff. Though I think 2months is pretty short amount of time... I dont think shes that much in love with you. :O

but good luck anyways!

[Toxic106]

Thanks for the advice iHEARTu. And everyone else. I don't know her that well but I'm pretty sure she's not gonna cheat on me. I think. She even tells me she likes someone, isn't that honest enough? And, I really want to be with her. I know 2 months' a short time, though she approached me. She's the one approached me and kinda asked if we could go out. *sigh* I dunno. I just don't want to let her go.

This past week we didn't get to see each other because she's on a school french trip. She's sad because I wasn't there with her. She understands though. She told me she's happy with me when she's WITH me. When she's not... well, she's not happy. Which makes it impossible because I'm gonna go on holiday for 6 weeks during summer. Knowing what a week could do to us, I seriously think we're gonna break up after summer.... I really don't want to. I really don't. What the hell can I do though?

[xxazurexx]

You can't do anything but trust that she won't cheat and while you are away.

It is silly to worry about things that are totally and way beyond your control. If she is going to cheat on you, she will and there isn't anything you can do about it.

What you can do, is to keep on showing her what she means to you and don't fail to shower her with plenty of attention and while you are away. Make her feel wanted and stuff you know. Keep the communication between you going. Call or text her everyday, tell her how much you miss her - that you have bought a lovely pressie for her, etc, etc.

A lot of guys tend to lose their gf/partner and when they start failing to show her attention anymore and they stop giving her attention. This is when a female can be tempted by the charms of another man, who may be paying her attention. If she truly loves you and you keep on paying her attention, then she aint going nowhere, trust me on that one.