Too immature?

[kidditoes]

First off, I'm the one that's older. I'm two years older than my boyfriend of almost 9 months now and I'm 20. These few months he's been complaining at times that I'm too child-like. Once I playfully slapped his thigh in front of his friend, and after his friend left, he got all serious and asked me why I never think before doing stuff. (I thought it was an affectionate act, but he apparently took it the other way) And last night, we were out at a party-ish dinner, I saw a male friend of mine that I haven't seen for a long time, so I gave him a hug and we were chit-chatting for a bit. I didn't think at all that it'd be a problem, but then later that night he said I was sitting too close to him and again warned me that I should think before I behave. I admit that I'm a carefree person, I don't care much about stuff like clothes and cosmetics, and at times I'm really forgetful and unorganized, but that doesn't mean that I'm immature, does it? I just wanna see how guys in general see girls with these kinds of personalities mentioned. Am I really childish, or he's just way too mature? And if you do think your girlfriend is pretty immature,for example, what would you do? Would you try to change her or just break up with her? I love my boyfriend, but I don't wanna change myself just so I'm "mature" for him. Please give me some advice!

[miSSleepy]

You don't sound to immature to me - he just sounds like a humour-less sour-puss

[bohemiandonut]

Yeah what an asshole. Dump the sucker and watch him beg for you back. It will be fun and he might even change because of it.

[vashti]

I see only two options. Either he is mentally unstable, or your behavior is questionable. Do you think he is crazy? If not, then your behavior is probably genuinely a problem. Assuming he is not crazy, it sounds like you may have a problem considering the consequences of your actions, and indeed, that IS a problem with maturity. How he chooses to handle it is anyone's guess... you can't force someone to grow up.

It sounds to me like he is setting some boundaries for what he will tolerate. Whether or not you can live with his boundaries is another question.

[lastwish]

I see only two options. Either he is mentally unstable, or your behavior is questionable. Do you think he is crazy?

^haha...this is a funny interpretation.

He sounds uptight. Maybe you guys have totally opposite personalities.

[kidditoes]

^haha...this is a funny interpretation.

He sounds uptight. Maybe you guys have totally opposite personalities.

yeah he's pretty uptight and serious. I'm serious at times but like to be funny and outgoing too. I don't know if we have opposite personalities, would that be a bad thing?

[kalupe]

clashing personalities can always bring up fights due to different perspectives and such, but sometimes that's the real test. it's either one has to change or just learn to actually accept this. although accepting your differences do not fully guarantee a fight-free relationship, but small things like that ..like you slapping his leg is too shallow to even be mad about... and before you two got together im sure he's seen what kind of personality it is that you have.. so like, what's up? -.-

[vashti]

I'm guessing he is outgrowing the idea that leg slapping and being flirty (which is how I'm sure he saw it) with old boyfriends is "cute".

[kalupe]

yeah well it's weird because the girl's older than the uptight bf. lol. yet he's so strict and serious and all that.

[vashti]

I'm not sure he's so uptight. We are only hearing her side of the story, and of course, if she has problems with maturity, she will cast him in a poor light to support her version of the story.

[kalupe]

could be. but this again just boils down to whether she's just really being immature and childish/childlike or he's uptight. anyway, don't be overanalyzing things. maybe he's just had a rough day or something that's why he responded that way?

you've been together for nine months...think about that. if he's had problems with your personality, you two had probably broken up in weeks or few months or even didn't end up together.

[cheeze_guy]

sounds like another virgin n a control freak

[kidditoes]

yeah well it's weird because the girl's older than the uptight bf. lol. yet he's so strict and serious and all that.

that's kind of true. He even tries to control my diet now but I think I needed that.