Describe your ideal partner.

[BoredGeorge]

In no particular order of priority.

1) Is attractive, submissive and confident.
2) A school teacher or other professional with spare time.
3) Is devoted to children and raising them.
4) Will let me **** her whenever I want.
5) Is willing to be a woman and take care of most domestic duties and understands it is a womans duty to raise children and just gets on with the job without complaining too much.
6) Is willing to understand this is fair compensation for a lot of the things that are assumed to be mens duties.
7) Appreciates the importance of education and good food. Will dress neatly and try to look good even for a lazy sunday afternoon indoors.
8) Is constantly wanting to improve herself and understand the importance of family and of helping children to become the best they can be especially when they are teenagers and young adults.
9) Will let me treat her like a lady.
10) Is willing to work on her career around family
11) Is hot, sexy, and intelligent.

That is my list, although not comprehensive.

Your turn.

[Gigabitch]

George, have you considered getting a mail-order bride? Because you're not describing an American woman, at least not one that isn't fanatically religious. George, you're describing a maid/ whore/ nanny that you don't really have to pay beyond room and board.

[Doc Durian]

Giga, unless he's adamant on all his criteria being unilaterally met, I don't see why it's an impossibility for him to wish for these things. I think most men are looking for some variation of his wishlist, myself included.

For all the gains of feminism, the movement has also destabilized itself and society to the point of men and women not knowing where they stand as a gender or in relationships together.

I'd love a partner who's number one priority was the domestic side of bringing up our family together, and that's not to say I wouldn't have an obligation myself to help her in that aspect either, nor her with the financial side of things where possible..... but.... to have the same goals and values and work for them together.

The template he highlighted, let me remind you, has a very good success rate... and one only need look at the last 50-60 years of social dysfunction to see it's still superior to the reality we're all... male and female, living in now.

My wish list:

1. Raised in a household with a stay at home parent and has these family oriented values herself.
2. Accepts herself (good, bad, quirks, etc...) and those of others.
3. Has a wicked sense of humour.
4. Has great budgeting/money sense.
5. Doesn't subscribe to the damaged fringes of the feminist movement (ie. men and women are equal, but also different and that's something to celebrate instead of subconsciously plot against in a relationship)
6. Believes in monogamous life long marriage.
7. Takes care of herself.
8. Has a healthy sex drive.
9. Intelligent with an inquisitive mind of her own.
10. Enjoys spending time together, and apart.
11. Isn't necessarily religious (I'm not at all), but strives to live her life according to the basic underlying morals and ethics most spiritual movements hold dearest.
12. Has my 100 percent trust and adoration as I do hers.
13. Distrusts all government officials, news reports, and various other instruments of sheeple propaganda.
14. Can mix in any crowd or strata.
15. Well spoken.
16. If I had to off someone, she'd help me disperse the evidence on cue and vice versa.
17. Smart enough to consider all angles in the above scenario because she's possibly also into watching and reading "crime" (misnomer) shows and literature for education's sake.
18. Moderately affectionate and wants the same.
19. Is not materialistic and doesn't care about houses/cars/clothes except as a means to an end, where necessary.
20. Has nomadic genes...
21. Open to new experiences.
22. Treats our children like little people and not ornaments or duties.


I'm sure there's more and the order I've laid out the current wish list is no indication at all of the pecking order/importance...

But as you can see, Giga, he and I are not that different in a number of aspects... and we're both unlikely to find the "perfect" match.... however, our future partners are unlikely to consider us a perfect match to their wish lists either...

But that's the beauty of life, isn't it? Ever the dynamic cycle of dreams, aspirations, chance meetings, decisions made good and bad, and a whole plethora of the unknown or yet to be realized.

Incidentally...

I've noticed of late that where as mail order brides used to be the sole realm of those with advancing years and more limited options, I'm encountering more and more 20-30 something men of desirable attributes with mail order brides/backpacker meetings/working holidays backgrounds together with their significant others of various foreign non-english speaking distractions.

Sometimes I wonder if it's only a matter of time before a good portion of Western women remove themselves completely out of the committed relationship equation and bombard future nursing homes with their alcohol washed, confused, and bitter corpses.

Which would be a shame.

[BoredGeorge]

And a career women is not worth having as a partner because what is point of a woman who will not be a woman ? She'll just try to get the most she can without any concern for you, she won't even love you or care about you and the children will be raised in daycare.

The second she advances herself she will decide she is no longer 'compatible' and that you have different priorities and she will leave you for someone higher up.

The best thing to do is to look for a woman who is in the middle somewhere. You don't want a pure home maker because that is no longer financially viable and you don't want a high powered executive.

As the above poster has shown some women even considerd the domestic duties of a female to be degrading or to make her a whore or a maid. I think it is honorable for a woman to care for her family, husband included because women have emotional powers and an ability to be caring that other people do not.

Some women are so spoiled they even expect the man to stay home. I find that completely ridiculous and those women should be ashamed for not doing their duties.

[candle23]

Decent, loving, intelligent, educated, family-oriented, and lastly someone I find physically attractive. A sense of humor would be a plus.

[ecojeanne]

lol doc to number 16. you're lookin' for a hippy chick. do they exist anymore?

i don't think the perfect partner will ever exist for me

[lovesjoyajm]

Doc, I think you can appreciate the difference between your list and George's - if not in the content, at least the attitude and way of expressing it. For example, you want a partner with a healthy sex drive, while George wants a submissive woman he can **** whenever he (not they) wants.

Also, if I have kids I would raise them myself and not let a daycare take care of that (shudder) but it's ridiculous to deny a woman the chance to live out her own dreams in addition to that. It's been said here before - making your children your only source of meaning or fulfillment in life puts a lot of pressure on them.

As for my wish list, off the top of my head:

- Family-oriented and has a good relationship with his family
- Intelligent
- good conversationalist
- good sense of humor and can make me laugh (very important)
- adventurous and outdoorsy
- loves children and animals

Can't think of anything else that's not somehow encompassed by the above.

[Doc Durian]

Doc, I think you can appreciate the difference between your list and George's - if not in the content, at least the attitude and way of expressing it. For example, you want a partner with a healthy sex drive, while George wants a submissive woman he can **** whenever he (not they) wants.

I'm sure he knows the difference between rape and consent... and the repercussions. Granted, I appreciate the way you've put it as well... He may merely have an inability in expressing the core essence of his thoughts or feelings (which isn't unheard of in a testosterone hopped up man, or a body building woman either).

Also, if I have kids I would raise them myself and not let a daycare take care of that (shudder) but it's ridiculous to deny a woman the chance to live out her own dreams in addition to that. It's been said here before - making your children your only source of meaning or fulfillment in life puts a lot of pressure on them.

I suppose it's not about denying anyone anything.. more of finding a compatible partner who shares your values and aspirations, together and individually. Although it could be said that those who do hand rear their children should make the distinction themselves of whether they're fulfilled outside of their domestic engineering duties. It's a bit of a red herring to equate staying at home with the kids as making them your sole endeavour.

As for my wish list, off the top of my head:

- Family-oriented and has a good relationship with his family
- Intelligent
- good conversationalist
- good sense of humor and can make me laugh (very important)
- adventurous and outdoorsy
- loves children and animals

Can't think of anything else that's not somehow encompassed by the above.

But you've not made the distinction of who wears more of the domestic pants and who wears more of the career path/bacon bringing path. Both simultaneously pursuing their careers makes for screwed up childcare/nanny reared wrecks.
It's an important question to be answered early in the relationship... or even before the relationship really takes off.

Who wears which pants more often than the other, and when should pants be swapped (income variations, life changing events, childrens needs, etc...)

[Doc Durian]

Just a side note which I forgot to mention.

I'd not accept a career woman to be the mother of my children.

There's nothing wrong with her choice, but it doesn't suit my values or expectations of a woman.

I believe Boredgeorge is much the same.

[Lipp]

[BoredGeorge]

I'm sure he knows the difference between rape and consent... and the repercussions. Granted, I appreciate the way you've put it as well... He may merely have an inability in expressing the core essence of his thoughts or feelings (which isn't unheard of in a testosterone hopped up man, or a body building woman either).



I suppose it's not about denying anyone anything.. more of finding a compatible partner who shares your values and aspirations, together and individually. Although it could be said that those who do hand rear their children should make the distinction themselves of whether they're fulfilled outside of their domestic engineering duties. It's a bit of a red herring to equate staying at home with the kids as making them your sole endeavour.



But you've not made the distinction of who wears more of the domestic pants and who wears more of the career path/bacon bringing path. Both simultaneously pursuing their careers makes for screwed up childcare/nanny reared wrecks.
It's an important question to be answered early in the relationship... or even before the relationship really takes off.

Who wears which pants more often than the other, and when should pants be swapped (income variations, life changing events, childrens needs, etc...)

Or perhaps other people simply cannot read. I said 'lets me **** her whenever I want' the key word is that she gives me permission when I want. Not when she feels like she in the mood without regard for my feelings.

Some relationships are one sided in that the woman expects the man to remain faithful yet, will not have sex with him when he requires sex.

The tone is used because as a man as far as sexuality goes I want to be the dominant one. I do not want to share anything with anyone Including her. I want her to be mine. As I have said this is my 'ideal partner'. I don't expect her to give up her entire life but I would hope that domestic duties would be high on any womans list of priority.

[Lipp]

I feel sorry for the perfect woman.

[Charlie Boy II]

1) intelligent
2) beautifu
3) killer sense of style
4) wick sense of humour.
5) Strong set of personal ethics
6) Strong character
7) Pragmatic approach to life's obstacles

[Mish]

I'm not going to place any constraints or criteria on my ideal woman. As long as we are attracted to each other, help each other grow and have a great chemistry everything will balance out in the end.

[vashti]

I don't really have a problem with either Doc's or BoyGeorge's list (except I don't think a lot of what BoyGeorge's list is composed of will mesh well with "submissive"). I also think that a male who wants a traditional woman such as this should get himself a good-paying job so he can afford one. If you are going to expect a woman to act traditionally, then you have to buck up and act like a traditional man. Also George - there are only so many hours in a day. If a woman is working because you can't properly support the family, you are going to have to pitch in with traditionally "female" jobs such as housework and child rearing. Finally, " her letting you fcuk her whenever you want" is surely less satisfying than having a woman who WANTS to do it with you. You might want to re-think that one.

As for me, I had a relatively traditional marriage. My husband supported the family financially while my kids were young enough to need their mama at home, and now that they are older (teens), I have gone back to work. My kids were always my priority, and unlike Lovesjoy, I don't think they suffered in any way by being the center of my world for X number of years, nor did I suffer for delaying the pursuit of my own agenda.