What's really going on ?

[jmon07]

Alright bit of a story here but i want to see other peoples opinion's...

Met this amazing women last year, Fell in love in no time at all and she was my girl before i could turn around. We shared everything the same and enjoyed everything the same. From music, movies or shows to camping, cars and exploring. The connection we had was unbelievable and we both knew that. She never had much when i met her, no car and no job but i gave her tons of motivation to get going and she did get a job and a car that i payed for. Yes she payed it back 100% that was our deal. We did a lot together and i was in between jobs at one time and still put her enjoyment as a priority even when i had to spend my last bit of money to go away camping or something. I really loved her, wait i still do a lot. The problem, After about 7-8 months into our 1 year (exactly to the day weirdly) relationship things got really bad. I had started a new job working nights which cut out tons of our time together. Our communication fell through the floor and we argued and fought so much that it really became to much for both of us. Small things like being late or being to loud, really anything could set one another off. So we called it off not really peacefully either because we were in the middle of this hiatus. So it basically stopped right here, a week after i had her come pick up her things and a bed of hers. Turns out she had rebounded already and met some guy to help her pickup her bed which i really didn't care because it was over and i thought i would never see her again which sucked so much to think about.

A couple weeks went by and she had messaged me asked me how i was doing yada yada... (this is a month ago from now) After a conversation she asked me to meet her one night after work, i did because i have a tremendous amount of feelings for her. So we talked about how much we missed this and that just typical stuff you would. But then things took a turn i really didn't expect, she asked for a hug which we did. And a while later she held my hand which i again was cool with. But then again shes telling me how this guy that shes been "seeing" has been hurt by women before and doesn't want to be hurt again by someone cheating or whatever... So eventually it turned into some kissing not a whole lot and not very "intimate". We then agreed we had to stop so we did and ended the night shortly after and went our ways. The next night she wanted to meet again and we did, but it was horrible. We started to argue and things just got out of hand again so we decided we cant be friends or even contact each other.

So a month went by and were now in last week, She emails me of all things. The same things happens how are you doing yada yada, She had blocked my number so i couldn't message her or call her in front of this new guy so she had decided to secretly email me. But at this point i am in a different zone, I sought out some help from a therapist of how to deal with my situation and feel right about things so i can move on from this. I know i really deeply love this girl at this point and would really do anything just to talk to her, I cant even get angry at her over things that would drive me nuts. So we met and i completely apologized for things i did, actions, words, everything. And i told her how much i loved her and every reason why, well i guess this made her heart melt again because she then pulls me in for a kiss on the cheek, and again. Eventually led to some face rubbing and hugs pretty intimate and she did hold my hand again... So that night ended later after more conversation nothing else. The next night about the same thing happened really minus the whole apologize deal, we just hungout at our old hangout down by the lake and talked. So she then went away for 4 days with this guy shes been seeing they went camping. Of course no emails or communication because hes around lol...

So the day shes back she wants to hangout again, we did and well yeah for the sake of the forum second base was reached and she was pulling me into it. I really didn't do a whole lot to lead her on to it. But it was really intimate and the kisses weren't very casual ! So we met again the next night and agreed it was bad, only for her really because of her situation. But we still held hands, hugged and she even rubbed my face some and hair... I mean i know shes in a rebound right now and shes making that more clear by how shes acting towards me, Shes obviously got lots of feelings held away for me somewhere because shes not the type to just go sleeping around. Shes not the most confident so yeah...

I really just want some opinions here, I've made my point clear to her a few times i would like to work on things as friends and see if we can learn to communicate and maybe reconnect one day. So she knows damn well i'm trying to get her back and fix what we shared. Opinions ? Odds ill get her back ?

[cultureclash]

I think you are asking the wrong question. Ask yourself: Even if you got her - is that what you want?

To me it sounds like you are not too good for each other. I think every person wants to be happy and if you have to worry so much about that other part in your relationship and how to make things work, then maybe it is just not that piece of a puzzle that fits best (?).

[jmon07]

I think you are asking the wrong question. Ask yourself: Even if you got her - is that what you want?

To me it sounds like you are not too good for each other. I think every person wants to be happy and if you have to worry so much about that other part in your relationship and how to make things work, then maybe it is just not that piece of a puzzle that fits best (?).

Touche, Nice way to say it. I'm gonna have a chat with my brain now