Trust Issues =X

[ktroxell]

So, I have been dating my boyfriend for 15 months now. I love him with all my heart and i think we both know we will be together for a long long time, if not forever. However, we fight, all the time. And most of it is because of the trust issues i have. Not going to get into details, but, he has lied to me many times. I have caught him 3 seperate times with something having to do with his ex girlfriend. He has never cheated (well that i know of lol) but really, if an ex girlfriend is still in the picture at all, its not gonna be good. So we've had those problems, and they broke my heart everytime they happened, cause it was the same thing 3 times. And of course there has been minor lies throughout the relationship but i guess there's never really any escaping them, ive lied minorly to him too over the year.

but the lies that he has told me, and the things that have happened have really made me just not able to trust him at all. not to mention i had major trust issues even before him. cause ive been cheated on before. like, everytime im at work and hes not i always have to be asking him where hes gonna be and what hes doing and stuff, and if he does go out with friends, its like i constantly worry and get sick over the fact that i dont know what is going on or what hes doing. its not right, cause yea hes never cheated on me. but its just that ive been lied to so many times by him and deceived, that the trust is just not there. and without trust u have nothing. i just dont know what to do cause this is causing us to fight so much. because of course he gets sick of hearing my shit and always accusing him of things. i wanna know how to be able to trust him. or atleast start somewhere. hes not a bad guy, he just has screwed up a lot. and i am just not the kinda person who can sit around and watch him keep screwing up and hurting me. i cant be hurt anymore.

i know theres no solid definite answer to this, i just really dont know what to do and i feel like this whole thing might ultimately lead to the end of us. and thats the LAST thing i ever want. in fact thats WHY im as crazy as i am, and need to know everything because i dont want him ****ing up again and ruining everything we have and could have in the future. i dont know what to doooo.

thanks for reading =/

[LoveHurts09]

not sure what he's lied to u about but people will normally lie when they think the other person wont deal well with the truth, maybe he just doesn't feel he can talk to u?

it comes down to how much u both want this to work, if u can't leave him then u have to stop living in the past and trust him, tell him that if he lies to u again then u'll walk BUT also tell him u will not get mad at him when he's honest with u (and mean it), like u said - he's not cheated on u and obviously he does something right or u wouldnt still be with him.