we're not meant for eachother, but we like eachother..?

[wrongemail]

21 years old. been with my gf for 3 months. we're not meant to be. i've noticed it, haven't told her. don't know if she's noticed it, but we haven't talked about it.

i don't see our relationship lasting much longer. the thing is, we genuinely like each other. when we're alone, it's like we're completely different people. we connect, we talk about random stuff. it's a lot of fun. but it's no different than a friendly relationship. it's almost like we are friends with benefits rather than boyfriend and girlfriend. she says our relationship is fine and that we are a good couple, but I see other couples and we're not like them at all....they are close in public, always near each other, holding hands, kissing, talking in each others ears and stuff....we are not like that.

when there are other people around, we barely talk to each other. we can go to a bar with some friends, and she's gonna spend more time with other people and barely talk to me, and i'll do the same. she doesn't flirt with other guys and i don't flirt with other girls. i can talk to other girls i know and keep up a conversation, and we can joke around and stuff like that, but with my gf it's like more of a robotic conversation with generic, short answers. and she does the same with other guys. its like we dont have stuff to talk about really. i see other people make her laugh and share inside jokes and i can't even make her laugh like they do or we don't have any inside jokes and stuff. so it makes me wonder if we are compatible.

we don't really have much to talk about. we just aren't meant to be, and it's kind of noticeable i think. but we really like each other.

it's clear that i have feelings for her, and it's clear she has feelings for me, but there's just something missing that makes it feel like a real relationship. maybe it's the lack of communication that a real relationship has.

I can't really put it into words. it's like 1+1 2 but the = is missing.

so what advice would you give 2 people who clearly like each other but don't have that...connection.

She tells me that she loves being with me, and that she wants me and i guess that's keeping us together. i want her to, and we have each other but there's something missing and i just can't describe it. i'm confused and i feel like we should break up, i don't know how to tell her, and i'm not sure i want to because i might regret it after.

[vashti]

Just tell her you like her, but you don't love her, and you want to break up.

[girl68]

I like lots of people. Does that mean that I will be able to have loving, lasting relationships with these people? No.

[Asip4u]

You are not ready to be with her, it's understandable. The reason you still like her is because you want options in case something doesn't work elsewhere. It's ok, just make sure she wants to be fwb.

[wrongemail]

well i dont want to break up with her. i feel like it is inevitable though. but i care about her a lot and want to work at it. i figure if we talk about it maybe some things will clear up. i just don't know how to discuss it. I want to be closer to her but maybe we don't know how to express it in words in a more relationship like manner...but the sexual side of our relationship is just fine...

I think what I'm saying it I want us to look more like a couple in public, but there's missing something..


i hope somebody understands what i'm trying to get at.

[Gigabitch]

For all you know, half of the people you see in public who you think are just friends are actually couples. Not everyone goes in for PDA. Have you told your girlfriend you need more attention in public? Do her friends like you?

[Lipp]

And frankly, if you guys already spend a fair share of time alone with one another you shouldn't get hung up on her focusing on her friends when she sees them.