dumped boyfriend after one year of long distance

[clove]

I can't really find a way to make this short and sweet, bare with me.


We were in TX and he had 2 kids in Cali so we said we'd try long distance, he assured me there was no love left for their mom and they couldn't stand each other. His cell got turned off right before he left and he's had to call from his cousins phone, or I'd text his cousin every so often to see if he was around.

eventually he just started falling off and he acted like he just didn't give a shit, so I started seeing someone else. about 2 weeks went by before i heard from him, and he still was acting completely apathetic and in a somewhat joking manner asked "you found another dude or what?" I said yes and he completely flipped out, hung up, called back, hung up, etc. Just went off saying how he'd been cheating on me the whole time and i was just old news.

Then like a month later called me to say how sorry he was and had no hard feelings. But then started bragging about his new house/car how he was a free man. I pretty much blew it off and hung up on him.

Trouble is I was (and still am) missing him so i called about a month after that. He was really nice for awhile, just kinda chatting, trying to flirt a little...but when I didn't flirt back he started talking about his money again asking me about my sex life, how my new boyfriend was treating me..."Tell him congratulations, he's lucky he has you."... He went from "I had a rough time when we broke up and i felt like i lost something good in me" to "its alright, i gained something better." I started crying a little and i told him it was just hard to talk to him and he said he'd call back. Never happened.

Why is he acting like this? I told him i care about him, and i moved on because i thought he didn't feel the same. Why does he say things that make me feel good and make me feel like he still loves me and wants me, but then switch back to "I found something better"?

To me, its like he's jealous and he does want me still but doesn't want to set aside his pride. Or he was hurting and now he wants me to hurt? Or maybe he's just an ass.

Its been about a month since that last conversation and i still miss him. I still love him, can't shake him.

Would it be worth it to give him a call and try to work it out or should I just accept things as they are....when he came around i didn't ever want to be with anyone else. Sure, new guy is great but its nothing compared to what I had with my ex. I really just want to be with him...i just don't know if its too late or even worth the effort.

[60mm]

Well I can't really comment on his end, I'm sure being a single dad of 2 kids is hard as-is without tossing in a long distance relationship. But if you're seeing other guys without even breaking things off then maybe this whole thing is an unrealistic expectation for you. And if he was cheating too then it probably was for him too.

[Gigabitch]

He's not qualified to carry on a long distance relationship. Stop contacting him. You'll never get what you need from this guy.

[IncognitoSir]

He's not qualified to carry on a long distance relationship. Stop contacting him. You'll never get what you need from this guy.

Stop wasting your time! And stop putting your heart through all this bullshit. Delete that bastards number. He's playing you like a puppet. There is NO HOPE for any relationship with this guy. He knows what buttons to push and you're allowing him to push them. Move on!

[xxazurexx]

^Yeah I agree, guy is just playing you.

Seems he was never 'that' serious about you, started distancing and only called you when he felt like it, it would appear. Not a very strong foundation on which to build anything more.
It takes 'two' to make a relationship work and he doesn't seem interested. Or he'd be calling regular and consistantly, arranging to meet you and the calls wouldn't be coming from his cousins phone. I find that a lot suspicious. The fact that you can't even reach him, directly on a number.

He's likely to be shacked back up with his ex and 2 kids.

[clove]

ugh he just called me today.
asking if i was happy with my new boyfriend, asking if i love him...what the hell??


thank you all for responding its been helpful and i appreciate it