Details to know:
We dated for a year and a half
both agreed this was the best relationship we've ever been in
respected eachother, were honest and open with each other
we had a mature relationship
broke up because I am lost in life and so is he. We both feel we need to go on this journey of finding ourselves alone. He instigated this break up. Our relationship started when I was going through a really dark time in my life and he just got back from travelling for 3 months.
Here is the letter I want to give to him, whenever I hear back from him (we broke up a week and a half ago)
"I don't want our old relationship back. I don't want you back. The start of our relationship was romantic and I really did love you, I never doubted that for a second. We weren't ready. I wasn't ready and you were too high off of travelling to take the next step in your life. I don't like who I was in the relationship; sad, grumpy and stressed. That is NOT me but it is me when I ignore things and not deal with issues. I needed time alone to recover from "suchnsuch". I needed time to get over that, but how was I suppose to know that at the time? It was my first time being alone and it was hard and scary. You were wonderful & impressive, I really did love you.
I'm glad we broke up. I'm glad I have this time and space to become my lovely self. I am so happy you are doing the same, you are so great, you can do anything.
The last time we talked on the phone was gut-wrenchingly heartbreaking. I was devastated, angry, offended, sad,depressed, in denial and jealous of possible future ladies. It was hard because I couldn't understand the separation, but I do now. Although, we really loved eachother, looking back on our relationship now, I wouldn't ask for it back. Me, lost. You, lost. Both of us trying to get our of our personal ruts while making this AMAZING relationship work, no, I don't want it back. Instead, I want the new and improved me, I want the happy me back. And I want the new, ambitious, happy you back. Because despite our current personal obstacles, it is you who I'm in love with.
I love you. I love your smile, your heart, your laugh, your generous personality. I love how you love and accept people even when they are bad people. I love you so much. I love how you know yourself so well that you had to let me go and go find yourself to become an even more amazing person, than you already are now.
So now, I am going to accept this break-up, I'm going to let you go. And, I'm going to move on."
What do you think? I am doing the No-Contact Rule, I'm not going to talk to him until after 30 days are up IF I hear from him, if I don't I'll reach out after 60 days. I want this letter to break his heart and then give him hope we will get back together one day.
What do you think?
Thank you,
Elephantgirl!