I love him but could this be a Major problem. Is he bi?

[fivefootgiant]

i have been dating my bf for 2 months now. we are doing extremely well and i know i am in love with him. He was originally my choreographer and i thought he was a tad bit feminine but the more i got to know him the more i began to like him. But the thought still arises as to whether he is bi or not. Yesterday i was at his house online. I had been on a website earlier and was looking for it in the history when i saw about 15-20 links that said "tranny sex" "girls with balls" "rate my tranny." My heart immediatley dropped. i began to feel sick to my stomach. Not because of what i had seen but the thought of my bf being attracted to it. I always had a vibe that he was attracted to men. I even asked and he told me he wasnt. The sex is ammmaaazing. He seems extremely attracted to me my body etc. i just dont know..

[Junket]

Ask him.

Also, no need to post duplicate threads in other forums, we get around to them all.

[fivefootgiant]

i did ask. i says that i the last few sentences "i even asked him." asking doesnt always relay a truthful answer =|

[vashti]

Personally, I would be completely turned off by this. You aren't obligated to accept every weird little fetish other people have, and in fact if they are bothersome to you, you should definitely take this as indication you aren't going to make a good couple. You are SUPPOSED to be selective now. You don't like something? Get rid of it. You don't want to be stuck for all your married life (down the road) with something you find distasteful.

[Junket]

i did ask. i says that i the last few sentences "i even asked him." asking doesnt always relay a truthful answer =|

Well you've only been dating for 2 months, so I'm sure you both haven't yet shared you're biggest secrets yet. If you really need to know, mention the website you found, but he may get upset you were "snooping" even if it wasn't intentional.

[Desdemona]

Transsexual women aren't men, but if you do suspect that he's attracted to girls with 'that bit extra' then it might be part of his sexuality worth talking about.

[alovehangoverr]

Transsexual women aren't men, but if you do suspect that he's attracted to girls with 'that bit extra' then it might be part of his sexuality worth talking about.

I agree with this.

Would it be a no-go for you if he was bi?

I dated a bi guy.. and honestly, it started to get a bit weird with his attraction to males and other weird little fetishes and it wasn't for me. But everyone is different.

[corinthian]

Transsexual women aren't men, but if you do suspect that he's attracted to girls with 'that bit extra' then it might be part of his sexuality worth talking about.

I agree. There is a whole spectrum here from pretty girls with an unexpected appendage to people who can only be described as "Truckers in high heels".

You should talk about it, although as you say it is well nigh impossible to know whether you are getting a straight answer. This is a tricky area. As Vashti points out, this could be very damaging to you in the long run; on the other hand, why throw something away that is good based only on what might be unfounded fears?

This might be one of those times when you just have to plead with the guy to be honest with you and respect your right to know in advance if this is ever going to become an issue and then you will just have to go with your instincts (which probably won't be a very useful guide, unfortunately). The more you like him, the greater the risk you should be prepared to take.

[Gigabitch]

Intuition is nothing to be trifled with. Pay attention. As one of my girlfriends points out, if you look at a failed relationship, you can usually remember seeing the problems from day one. You just have to learn to pay attention.

IMO, the fact that you're already snooping on his computer when you've barely been going out long enough to be exclusive together is as much of a red flag as his online history.