why does it bother me?

[davidsbabygirl]

I tend to get so upset for some reason when my husband wants to go i guess you can say " do his own thing." It just for some reason fuels a fire in me. I get so upset and want to know hes doing it and who hes looking at while doing it. I keep assuming that its just me and my self esteem problem but lately I dont really know. Its like I am assuming that hes going to cheat on me. Not that he has ever gave me a reason that he would. I just dont understand! Is anyone else like this?


The only way i can say it is masturbating.

[lesa]

I tend to get so upset for some reason when my husband wants to go i guess you can say " do his own thing." It just for some reason fuels a fire in me. I get so upset and want to know hes doing it and who hes looking at while doing it. I keep assuming that its just me and my self esteem problem but lately I dont really know. Its like I am assuming that hes going to cheat on me. Not that he has ever gave me a reason that he would. I just dont understand! Is anyone else like this?

I am sorry but I do not understand what do you mean. Can you clarify what is "do his own thing"?

[IndiReloaded]

I don't understand either. Could you rephrase your question w/more details please?

[davidsbabygirl]

masturbating

[Gigabitch]

If your husband didn't masturbate it would be really, really weird. It's not that he doesn't want you, he just needs a wank. It's completely different from having sex. Remember, he was having sex with himself long before you entered the picture and his hand's not jealous of you...

How in the world does this come up, though? Is he doing it in your bed, laying next to you? If so, that's ****ed up and it has to stop. Masturbation is private- you should stay out of it and he should have the decency to do it when you're not around.

[IndiReloaded]

I've been with my husband almost 20 years. Its normal, OP.

Now, if he's doing it so much that he's denying YOU sexual gratification, that's NOT okay. Is that the case?

[Junket]

I used to masturbate often.

But now that I get to f*ck, I almost never do it.

But I'm sure I'll get around to doing it again.

[davidsbabygirl]

no he doesnt do it in the bed with me. he does it in the bathroom with his laptop. and yes he does still sexually please me. usally the most he does masturbate is while im on my monthly curse. Now he does do it sometimes when i am not on my period. Does noonelse not feel kind of betrayed by your girl/guy masturbating to other peoples pictures?

[Riyko]

The only time it bothers me when my boyfriend does it is if he's next to me or tells me about it otherwise I don't care.

I understand where you're coming from I used to feel the same way, but now I feel better about it because him and I talked about it =) maybe talk to him about it.

[Junket]

I'd be offended if my girlfriend was offended.

Based off what you've said, there's nothing here that I see as abnormal.

If anything, you'll either shame him, or put him on the defensive if you even attempt to get him to stop. Neither of which will go your way, and will only distance him from you.

[Mish]

Does noonelse not feel kind of betrayed by your girl/guy masturbating to other peoples pictures?

Is that the only issue? Take some sexy snaps of you and give it to him, next time he'll be taking your photos with him into the bathroom.

You may need to replace them periodicly as they get covered

[davidsbabygirl]

Is that the only issue? Take some sexy snaps of you and give it to him, next time he'll be taking your photos with him into the bathroom.

You may need to replace them periodicly as they get covered

Yeah I know. I have a bit of a low self esteem so that might be it. I really dont know I have grown to just accept that hes going to do it but it still bothers me to the extent i wanna know when he is doing it.

[lesa]

Actually I want my boyfriend to masturbate and do it until his hand falls off. I'd rather he do that then ever be tempted to find another female.

I have never seen him do it...so I don't know if videos, pictures, or online stuff is involved. I wasn't thinking about that. Hmmm, I think I too would be a little bothered to know that he is looking at photos, etc. I think it is better that I do not know such things. I'd rather he look at my photos .

Like everyone else said it is normal and much better than him seeking others for sexual gratification. I would not risk embarrass him unless there are other signs that something else is going on.

[tooxshort]

In reality, you can't be a piece of meat forever ...

The spark isn't always there ... but better his hand than another person eh? He's loyal to you, but some people need variation ... without technically "cheating" ...

[Gigabitch]

Does noonelse not feel kind of betrayed by your girl/guy masturbating to other peoples pictures?

I guess that would depend on whether he *liked* them or if they were just pieces of mindless flesh that turned on his highly visual male mind. If he were attaching some kind of emotional fantasy to it, it would be disturbing, for instance if he had some online friend that he chatted on a forum with and was masturbating to HER picture.

If it's just a body, I don't really give a shit.