feel so broken.

[blondie102]

hi everyone
feel like i need to post on here to make myself feel better and any advice would be appreciated
so..here it goes

i was with my boyfriend nearly 3 years up untill a few days ago.we met online a long time ago and have been very close since,he moved up to my city and after about a year together i moved in with him,we are so totally different but got on so well and it worked.he works away so we go without seeing each other,but was together at weekends without fail and spent a lot of time together when he was out of work,im nearly 19 and he is 28,so there is an age gap but it never got in the way,hes quite a free spirit and will talk to anyone and has always been quite distant with everyone,even me,im quite the opposite and rather private,i know hes struggling to grow up quite a lot,and his past of lots of drug use hasnt helped.
iv always been quite older headed and so please dont think im just a naive girl,
anyways,after living together for a year he decided he couldnt cope being 70 miles away from home as he didnt really have many friends up here,he went back home,found us a house and filled my hopes with promises of a new life in his hometown,while im at my moms doing my driving lessons and getting ready to move(which has been rather hard)and seeing him at weekends,a few weeks ago his sister and brother-in-law broke up after a 10year marriage,he has took this quite hard and a few days later told me he had been thinking and that he didnt know if we had a future together,he said he didnt want kids,nor marriage and never would,and that it would all end anyway because he couldnt give me what i wanted in the future.and a few days ago said it was over and he was no longer in love with me,hes left me heartbroken,no new home,no boyfriend,i miss him so much,havent spoke to him for two days now,and its hard,he is my best friend,i no he hasnt got anyone else,he has said he doesnt want anyone,and wants to be alone,the last few months i have seen the signs,he went of sex and even though he has never showed many emotions he stopped saying that he missed me when i was away,i dont no what to do ,or even how to cope anymore.

what do you think?
how do i try and feel normal again?
any advice would be great,especially from a man as you guys are so different lol

thankyou x

[cmacattack1]

So you guys began dating when you were 16 and he was 25? Other than the fact that it's statutory rape, the age gap does certainly make a big difference here. It's a little beyond the senior dating a freshman. You guys are at very different times in your lives and want different things. I'm sure what his sister went through has certainly thrown him for an emotional loop and caused him to do some thinking and possibly contributed to the break up, but I ultimately think that what you guys have isn't what he wants or what he has seen for himself at this point in his life.

I don't believe he NEVER wants to get married and I don't believe he NEVER wants to have children. Not for a second. People change their mind all the time. Feelings change all the time as well. I think he is looking for somebody else, somebody different, something he has much more in common with and works around what he wants and his schedule. He moved up there to be with you but it's not working out for him, as rarely these cases do.

Don't take it personal, it shouldn't take away anything away from what you are and what you can provide. Are you in school or going to school? This should allow you to socialize more and possibly meet and hang out with somebody that can fit more with your current life and what you want. I'm not saying you should go out there looking for other guys or to forget him completely. It's not easy after three years, you feel like you just lost a big part of you. But you can certainly focus on having a good time with your friends and honestly when you aren't looking for something, it will completely blindside you.

I hope it helps and I'm sorry. Keep in mind that while you guys may both love each other (even though he said he didn't) that it doesn't always work out because you are at different places in your lives.

[blondie102]

its not rape where im from
and it was never seedy,no not in school,i work
thanks for the advice