OK, there is an old sketch by Monty Python in which a band of actors and magicians has to confuse a cat that has become too despondent, I am feeling like that cat.
I meet this guy on an online dating site, we exchange some emails, after around 2 months he asks me out, we chat a couple times, we meet, he seems a good person, a bit reserved, we meet again, he seems to understand me and we have fun and find a LOT in common, we meet again, he doesn't kiss me and doesn't offer to take me home, I assume he only wants good company, I give him some more time in case he is shy, we meet once again, very nice conversation, touches my body but keeps a physical distance at all times, at the end he stamps one on my lips and runs away, in between dates he calls but not that much, and two days after the last date he sends an sms that says "X".
At this point I am getting kind of annoyed from this ambiguity after one month and 1/2 of going out (we are both late 30ies) and I really nicely write him that I don't understand if he just wants my company for going to the cinema or for something else, to which he answers "I live in the moment, I don't know what I want, if you are looking for Mr Clarity, that's not me", and he states that he needs to get physical to know me better (I said that I wanted to know him better before having sex, because he asked me about sex without even having kissed me).
At this point I dump him, and then he writes a few times that he misunderstood the question, misses me (more or less), that he is looking for love, and I invite him home for dinner.
He arrives, first thing he says is "look, no wine and no flowers, nothing!" (thank you, I am very charmed), second he says that he is stoned from the night before, although he never ever takes drugs. Finally we watch a movie, and he seems not to like it but doesn't want me to change, and before the end he stands up, mutters "we are too different" and walks out. (!!?) The morning after I see an email "you are not going to get rid of me that easily" (?!?), and another one that denies being stoned the night before. And a third one asking me out on 2 dates instead of one, which I declined.
He cancels me from his Facebook friends and other social networks, then he asks me out again one more time, regretting that we never kissed, and that he shouldn't let me slip through his fingers (!?! didn't he just push me away?) and that his behavior was just due to bad timing and crossed signals (?!).
This guy has been married twice at age 36, has two children, seems a good father, and on the second date said he had depression but he has this great life with a lot of friends, doesn't seem very depressed to me. Is there a minimal chance that I misunderstood something and this guy is actually a nice guy and that he liked me? Could I have done something differently'? I am writing because we seemed like a perfect match, aside from crazy not nice behavior.. My head is spinning..
uh, very long message, sorry..