she has not enough feelings to commit right now

[tom senna]

I had a year long distance relationship and we had a amazing time together, never having serious fights. She was all over me, and so I was all over hers. She said many times that she loves me and adores me. A very sweet young woman with whom I definitely wanted to go on.

One months ago I felt she started to doubt about her feelings; she became edgy sometimes and said I am too pushy. After me asking, I made her starting to think over the relationship and finally literally said her feelings were not strong enough to commit right now, even though she likes me a lot. I told her that I respect her feelings and wished her good luck. I stayed cool. No fight. She never spoke out the word break-up, but now I have the feeling I did it by ending the discussion. I wanted her to give her space and make her feel the difference if we would not be calling everyday.

This was also the moment she moved to another city for a totally new job. After the break-up we had no contact for one week, and then suddenly she emails me to "just to say" that everything goes well at the new job and asks me how I am. I replied short and cool not really saying what I am up to and how I feel.

It is very confusing, and would like to understand better what went wrong. One month ago everything was A-ok and now we broke up. I have the feeling she is indecisive and cannot give herself time to think it over given her new job and relocation.

My question is what should I do now ? Keep contact as low as possible and go on, may be she contacts me again. Or engage in talking to her myself in a couple of weeks ?

Some advice would be helpful here.

[DarkHelmet82]

i have a similar situation where my ex had just gotten out of a serious reltionship.. she said she like me but just isnt ready to date anyone. I haven't spoken to her in a few days. From what i have been finding out no contact for a little bit and then little contact works wonders.. The queston is WHEN do you contact them?

[tom senna]

Thanks for joining the discussion. When to contact them is not so important question for me right now. I am more puzzled what she meant when she said she loves me but then but everything in doubt. Is this an emotional reaction in the current situation, or are her feelings really not strong enough.

[DarkHelmet82]

maybe shes falling for you but isnt ready yet...

[tom senna]

maybe, and hey, where are is the female feedback ? :-)

[deepika_16]

Its a long distance relationship and you said its been 1 year. See a couple needs his/her partner to be with him/her. Maybe she is backing off from the relationship because you both are not contacting each other much, both of you must not be having time for each other. In a long distance relationship to give time to each other is very important. Its totally on you what you want. But a relationship is not continued half-heartedly.