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Thread: Boyfriend doesnt love me.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Gender
    Female
    Posts
    19

    Boyfriend doesnt love me.

    We were together for one year and then we broke up for about 3 months. Now we started dating again.
    The problem I have is that I love him and he doesnt. And it showed in his behaviour. He said that he didnt begin to love me because we were fighting too much and he cant be in love with someone who hes fighting with, but the thing is that we were fighting because he was too cold to me.
    Now we started seeing each other again but I just cant get this out of my mind. And also, he said that in the spring he wants to go to another country to work. So its clear that he doesnt have future plans with me.
    I am leaving the country too, but going in a different one than he is. And I told him a few times why dont you come with me and of course he said no.
    This is why today we talked and I told him that for these reasons I cant be with him anymore.
    He said that he doesnt know what time will bring and that maybe he'll love me someday and that its not for sure that he's leaving.. but Im tired of waiting..
    I thought for a moment oh, lets spend time with him until he's gone, and I wont be alone for Christmas and so on, but do you think this would be right? Should I just be with him even if he doesnt love me just because I hate being alone this time of year? We get along really well, but....
    Thank you!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender
    Male
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    1,517
    If you get along with him and don't want to be alone for the holidays, you can always spend time as friends. But a relationship does not sound like it is in the works. If he doesn't feel for you the way you do for him, it is not going to work out. Plus, your lives are taking you two in different directions.

    I would suggest breaking all ties with him and wishing him well. Then you can move on with your life and find other romantic interests.

    Good luck.
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Surrey, BC
    Posts
    15,542
    Your BF is trying to tell you something here. He isn't very good with his communication skills, he is quite manipulative and abusive with what he says but I see his message. You need to better yourself as a person. You need to be more independent and less dependent on him. You need to stop being clingy, needy and insecure. Being like that puts a lot of pressure on him and so he pushes you away. Give him space, don't cal him everyday, don't see him everyday, go out and get a life of your own, start new activities to keep you busy. You see a BF shouldn't be your life but only just a part of your life. You need other things than him to fill it. So if he wants to chill with his buddies for a few night, shut up and let him have his time to do his own thing. Don't get jealous, needy, bitchy or winey if he wants his space. I guarantee you, if you change these things in your life, his attitude towards you will change, and hopefully you will respect yourself more and be more mature.

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