Well, to start, we both are in our early 20's and college students. Our relationship started great, but lately, we seem to get on each others nerves more often. I love her, and she loves me, but just the little things come in more now. We have been dating since last summer and we currently live together. What is starting to bother me though, and I don't know why, is thinking about her previous partners. She has had sex with 8 different people, 50% relationships 50% "friends". It just bothers me because this is mostly only over a 3 year period, when you consider the 2 long term relationships into it. She also had experimented with a handful of different drugs, unlike me, who has only smoked weed. I love her, and she says she has changed from that lifestyle and her "sexual liberation" phase, but still, lately it has always been on my mind.
Is this alot? If they were all relationships, I wouldn't care, but only half were. I don't know why it bothers me now, as it didn't before, but I really want to not act distant from her, but I feel apathetic now when we have arguments. If I try to talk to her about this kind of stuff, she usually gets defensive and I feel guilty.
I'm just scared. I've never felt the apathy in arguments that I feel now. I can just stare at the ceiling now, and just not care. I'm worried our relationship is going to go downhill quick, and that in turn makes me worry about her past. I never cared about this stuff with people before, but for some reason it bothers me when its her. I don't like picturing her doing all this stuff.
I need help. Most of my friends have never had a long term relationship, and the ones that have have been cheated on. I don't know how to get over this, I have nobody to talk to, and I don't want to see this relationship fall apart, but I also don't want to have to deal with these images in my head for the whole relationship.
I need advice.
Thanks