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Thread: Confused about a relationsip with my lady friend

  1. #1
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    Confused about a relationsip with my lady friend

    I have a lady friend, and we have been friends for almost 2 years. We had spent so much time together in school during these 2 years. She talked to me, stayed with me, and texted me almost all the time throughout the entire day. I enjoyed it because I actually loved her even though she has a bf. That is not the point I am trying to make here. Well spending time together happened because we worked together on every single project together for every class. We would still talk about so many other things than school and make jokes and all that. Not looking at her as someone I love, but just looking at her as a close friend was valid. She told me that I was her close friend too.

    Now this semester is our last semester and we are graduating soon, and now in this semester she has barely talked to me, so definitely no texting. I just don't understand why she would do that. I even told when we were close that i hate when people stop talking to me for no reason. I really can't bear the pain sometimes. It bothers me a lot. I personally feel that she doesn't like me anymore due to who know what reason, or it is just that she doesn't need me anymore for any school work. Like me as in a friend. She used to send me snapchats everyday and that has stopped entirely now.

    I honestly want to ask what her problem is with me. I am usually pissed off at her because she has been not talking to me, while questioning to myself, why would a person do that? I mean obviously I don't show that I am pissed off. I still act neutral and act as if everything is fine. As I said, I really want to know the reason why she is doing this to me? If she could tell me the reasons (if she doesn't like me) why, then I don't have a problem with that. But, it is like I am dying inside thinking about this thing everyday. It's like just tell me. And, i guess i can't bear the fact that she doesn't talk to me because I still kinda have feelings for her even though it may not feel like that.

    I really need someone to tell me what to do. Should I ask her or not? I am just afraid to do it because what if she does like me, and I ruin it by even asking her that? But, from her chameleon behavior, it shows to me that doesn't like me. I am not good at understand this like and dislike thing, so would definitely appreciate the advice. I just don't want to be bothered and trapped in a cell thinking what she thinks about me as a friend. I would rather have it out in the open and whatever it is I can take the answer. If she tells me that she doesn't like me then I have no problem with that.
    Please help. I guess this is complicated.
    Last edited by Bob111; 29-03-17 at 07:34 AM.

  2. #2
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    Mar 2017
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    Sounds like your showing her all the week signs that most males do, you're needy, and not allowing her to have some of her freedom women are like cats they need to wonder and when they are ready they will come back to you. You want her attention, stop calling, texting and emailing her. Take away the power and allow her to come to you, remember the best gift a human can give another person is their time. This will work because all of sudden you are allowing her to think about you, she will miss not hearing from you, you have become a way to a predictable woman just hate that in male show signs of weakness, the woman just does not want to be with a week man. Hope this helps!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2017
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    stop pretending you only want to be her friend
    thats unhealthy
    and nothing a friend would do in the first place.

    you feel hurt because she avoids you - or doesnt use you for school things anymore
    well you were pretending to be her close friend the entire time when you wanted to be her lover.
    If you think I am insulting you with my post or bashing you: You do not get the point.
    I am not here to insult or bash anyone. I offer up my free time to help. Take from my post what is useful to you.
    If you are angry about my post or myself, then please stop and think how that happened. Usually that is the way the brain responds if a critical belief system is challenged (its called cognitive dissonance). If you have trouble with it please answer in the thread. I will come back to you.

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