My ex is in the army which may help put some of this in context.
We had been going through a rocky patch but had got through it - were even talking of marriage but I went over this weekend and stumbled on a disciplinary action against him for sleeping with an "underrage" potential officer (it isn't stat rape as it is what the army considers underrage and not the law). i.e. he has had at least one one night stand whilst going out with me.
When I confronted him he said that he was only going out with me so that we'd drift apart and have a "nice break".
I can finally say I now see him for who he really is. Someone who cheats and then because he gets found out (there was a goddamn investigation into it cos she was ****ing 17) everyone in his camp knew about it but no-one had the guts to tell me about it. In the report he denies he is with anyone - there was a section in the report saying that they were both single - I was down there seeing him the weekend before, and says he wanted to have a relationship with her to try to get a leaner punishment and is going to take her to this reunion thing to rub people's noses in it. the smug git. and now, after all that says he still cares about me and wants to be friends.
I mean wtf friends?????
I've had it I really have, I don't want to have anything more to do with him. I'm really gutted. People who are friends don't do that to eachother do they? I've been such a fool and so blind. I've acted like a ****ing 15 year old with no mind of my own and alienated friends and family because of him. I'm so hurt ande so disgusted and the thing is I feel dirty like I've been violated and he tells me to stop crying and get over it.
And the worst thing is I miss him already, I miss hearing the sound of his voice. I mean what kind of stupid fool am I????
I don't think I've ever been hurt this much in my life. and by the person who I always stood up for no matter what. And what out of the last five years has been real? Was any of it?