First impressions.

[minisprite]

Hey, I joined the forum today in hope to receive advice on my current situation.

I expected one answer to crop up the most, which admittedly is probably what I should do.
But I also expected some advice on what to do without ending the relationship.
Or just someone to talk to who has been in a similar situation...

...but instead I was insulted by what I can only call one of those 'keyboard warriors' .


I will defiantly not be using this forum again as I was insulted by someone, who clearly has never been in that situation and has nothing better to do.

I am extremely dissapointed in how some people have reacted to this. But yet give plenty of advice and help to what I would see as minor situations.

But one lesson I have learned today is - don't bother asking for advice from people who don't know you because they will judge you as much as those who do.

If you need some advice on a complicated situation, don't ask these lot as their brains are too small to even read your post.

Thank you.

[Wakeup]

You should be that decisive about your unhealthy and codependent relationship. Truly, you're mired in a disfunctional dynamic with a man who has been and most likely still is dabbling in extra-curricular activities with both men and women and you wonder why your angst ridden and on the defensive.

Further, you've said it's hard for you to leave because there is a child involved which to me, stinks of 1920's when women stayed because they were'nt allowed to work for the most part and they couldn't leave do to poverty as the divorce laws were so one sided. You do not stay in dysfunctional relationships if there are children involved. You owe them more then that kind of life.

This is not a minor situation and if you were thinking the least bit straight you would either leave now or ask him to join you in couples counceling or he go to therapy on his own to stop the lies, deceit, infidelity and attention whoring. If he won't do that, then this is simply a case of you and your child being the Titanic and you are currently headed full speed toward that iceberg.

Good luck, don't keep going full steam ahead without doing something. To us your problem and the solution is obvious. To you, your fear of being alone blinds you.

Good luck.

[minisprite]

As that was probably the most helpful and in detail reply, I can only agree with you.
I am blind but I need answers.
I need to know if he is still continuing this internet affair.
I can't help but feel that if I leave I will never get the answers I NEED.
The relationship between my son and partner is fantastic, which confuses me even further as to why he could do such a thing to me.
I have considered councilling, I am not sure if he has but we may have to look into it.
Thank you.

[smackie9]

I'd like to add that this person you are dating may have excellent fatherly qualities towards a child, he obviously feels on an adult level he is entitled to do whatever he wants. He can still have a wonderful relationship with your son when he goes to visit, while you find yourself a man that doesn't have the morals of an alley cat. If this is the best relationship you can muster up, then you definitely need counseling because you lack any self worth. You are setting a very poor example to your son, and he will learn that it's OK to poorly treat women from that ass you are with. And you worry about your son without having this man in his life?...shhhheeeeshhh! It doesn't matter how young your son is, children are very perceptive of what is going on whether you think other wise.

I agree with Wakeup, that as it stands now, and if you don't leave, it's full steam ahead into that iceberg.

[jetta86s]

Anywhere you go, there will be those that hurt you. Lesson is, you should be able to handle this because even if you leave this forum, that doesn't mean you're not getting insults ever again.

[prettygirl]

You should follow what your heart says. Think that they're just keyboards. They have nothing to do with you.