Me and this guy go a few years back. He was interested first.
But due to a mixture of my inexperience, not knowing what I want, and extreme introversion, I had this push-pull thing going on with him which spanned over three years (please bear with me), and I came off like I was playing games with him this whole time. This was unbeknownst to me then; and I only realised the effect of what I was doing when I explained the situation to a friend.
By the end of those three years, the last time I pulled back again, he said it wasn't possible for us to be together anymore (at that point, he was sure I was just playing games with him.)
I have since explained myself, and apologized (since I knew I had taken his attention for granted somewhat) and he has been quiet.
Despite all this, we don't actually know each other very well. It's one of those situations where the "relationship" was stuck in the courtship phase, and the two people weren't friends before.
The only "connection" we have now is facebook.
I've been slowly letting him know what I was really thinking/feeling this whole time with occasional status updates.
He used to copy stuff I do on there, now he seems to be doing it again (I'm know I'm not imagining this, because it's something, very, specific).
He seems to "warm up" more when I let out my vulnerable side out (as opposed to the game-playing b*tch I portrated myself as), and when I casually talked about my future plans for children (I know he wants kids himself).
I saw him today; he walked by me, and turned his head to hold the gaze (whilst still walking) with a half-smile; whereas he would just ignore me before.
What I want to know is..
Do I still have the SLIGHTEST bit of chance with this guy?
I really like him. He's one of the few you meet in a lifetime where the attraction is just so strong, it can go on for years like this, and you just know it's not forced.
I know trust takes time to rebuild. But would I have a chance if I, for once, would come out of my shell, and show him who I am, let him get to know me, and hope he'd see a "new" side? I know being aggressive and pushy at this stage is a bad idea.
I know where he works so I can "casually" see him if I wanted to (and it doesn't need to be obvious since he works in a ward, and I can go see cases there any time), and slowly build a real connection? Or should I just lay low and keep doing what I've been doing on facebook and hope he contacts me?
Would it (if anything) be enough to overcome what happened before? Or is it a total lost cause?
Sorry this is so long-winded. But it means a lot to me.
ANY honest advice/thoughts are much appreciated!!