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Thread: Please help. I'm struggling.

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    56

    Please help. I'm struggling.

    So last Summer I started chatting on Facebook chat to this guy. He is a friend of my best friend's fiancee (he lives 2 hours away). The chatting became more regular and we spent about 4 months where we chatted every Sunday for up to 4 hours at a time. It was so weird. We connected and talked about everything. I really started to like him and saw him in person a few times when I was visiting my friend and we were just as flirty then.
    This was going on for a long time and I became frustrated that I kept dropping hints about us going on a date or something and nothing would come of it. I sucked it up and asked him if there was any chance we could take our relationship off screen and see if we had anything to really be together. He replied saying he was interested, but the distance was too much for him. He said in the future who knows, but right now it wouldnt work.
    I was gutted obviously and have been strong and tried to cut him out of my life because its too painful chatting to him when we're not seeing each other or even dating.
    We haven't spoken now in a couple of months.
    The problem now is that I can't stop thinking about him. I really think I may be in love with him, which is ridiculous because I shouldn't like him because he doesn't want to be with me. I am desperate to move on, but I'm finding it so hard. We don't chat at all and so he's not in my life, but I dream about him all the time and he's always on my mind.
    I don't know if there is a solution but if anyone can offer me any advice please let me know.
    Thanks for reading, sorry if this was a long post!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2013
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    North Carolina
    Posts
    22
    Well my advice to you is that when it comes to women and men we have to have a friendship before a relationship that's where most people get confused you have to know him more just like he has to know you. now there is nothing wrong with chatting with him i say continue but don't put your life on hold for him either. if he has enough sense then he will see what is before his eyes and act on it. still be his friend and you never know you just may grow on him to the point that he does wanna take that chance. good luck.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Gender
    Female
    Location
    Surrey, BC
    Posts
    15,542
    He stopped chatting because he didn't want to commit to anything so he backed off knowing your intentions. You need to do the same. He has no real interest in a relationship he made that pretty clear. He put a maybe in there to let you down easy. I'm guessing he would have agreed a fling, but nothing worth being serious about. You can't let it go because by nature, we desire more what we can't have. Internet relationships will isolate you from dating irl, so I suggest you get your friends to fix you up with someone locally and stay off the computer hoping for him to message you again.

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