I've gotten to know this guy pretty well on formspring, and we've been friends for nearly 4 months now. And I know it sounds ridiculous, but I've had this HUGE crush on him during those 4 months. And...well, a few days ago he confessed that he really started liking me 2 weeks ago. He said that, unlike everyone else, I was always there for him when he had problems, and I never lost my impatience or ditched him when he needed someone to talk to. He also tends to flirt and be promiscuous towards other girls on formspring, but he said that he liked me a lot because I was "genuine", and he just couldn't understand how I, someone he never met before, could mean so much to him. And that he might actually love someone like me in his life. He said he's very very serious about me...:/ And I know this isn't a very humble thing to say, but I have to admit, I have always been there when he pretty much needed me.
Anyway, we're supposed to get "e-married" today.lol. He said this "e-marriage" will be special, not like the other girls. He even rejected others for me...Lol. So basically, we're supposed to "date" online, and just see where this relationship goes. We may meet each other someday if our relationship turns very serious...But...I'm having second thoughts. I'm very ashamed to say this, but I've checked his emails because I know he's kinda promiscuous. One of my friends on formspring, who was his "former wife" (lol), emails him, and they've been having cyber-sex since last night. He calls it "playing", so it's pretty much roleplaying... I know I'm an idiot to believe that online relationships could work, but it just hurt me to see that. I think he just goes to her for "cyber sex" while we're more connected at an emotional and mental level. I don't think he's entirely serious about her, but it still hurts me....
Still...if our relationship ever went anywhere and turned out to be serious, I wouldn't want to be with a guy who would cheat on me or something like that. :/ So, should I just back out of this relationship or "e-marriage" while I still can? We're best friends online, and we just connect so much at an intimate emotional level. But this whole "cyber-sex"/playing/roleplaying thing is just bothering me. So what should I do? Please don't comment on how wrong it was to check his emails, because I feel very guilty about that, and please don't say how online relationships are ridiculous, because now I feel like a complete idiot....
Thank you for taking the time to read this...