I guess i just start telling my story and hope someone will understand me somehow..
The chance that someone will understand this really complicated story is ZERO..
I was playing a game when i met a girl in this game. She was 16 years old. She was really nicel and she wanted my msn.. so i gave it ^^. Just a friend ^^.
There was no point of love at that time ( 9 months ago ). She told me she was from Canada which seemed okay to me. After starting to talk about all kinds of stuff and getting know eachother better, she said that she wasnt from Canada but from Finland. She felt sorry that she lied but i really loved her.. it sounds stupid but i really did..
She said she fell in love with me.. but what i didnt know is that she had a bf already also from the internet.. She said that all he wanted was seeing her on cam and talking dirty.. she didnt want that anymore so i stayed at her side and helped her with her problems by talking by talking about them.. and when she cried, i tried calm her down.. She told me that i was the only person that could calm her down and make her happy..
About 2 months before she added me on msn.. she apparently knew an other guy from the internet who she fell in love with but he left her..
I was blinded by love and didnt care.. She broke up with her bf and went together with me. Believe me, i was happy.. really happy..
I think we were 4 months together, when we were talking about meeting and how we would go out and stuff.. when she told me she had sex.. wouldnt have been a problem but she told me from the beginning that she was a virgin.. not that it mattered cuz i truely love her.. She felt so sorry.. she said she couldnt forgive herself..
I made poems for her.. she wanted to hear my voice so i called her with my phone and we talked.. i showed myself in front of cam. I am a really shy guy.. i never went on cam before but for some reason i did for her.. i aint good-looking.. neither was body what u can call perfect. I showed myself in cam without clothes after 6 months being together.. now i think how could i have been so stupid.. but too late..
She truely loved me.. only me... That was what she said but reality was in my eyes different.. Cuz same time that guy who left her.. showed up on msn and she started asking me.. "What if i like 2 guys" i got angry and asked her what she ment.. "It wouldnt matter if i loved someone else right? cuz i am with u right?" She isnt with him yet.. but wont take long..
Now she says i should forget about her and leave her pass.. problem is i cant.. i really love her.. I fought for her for so long.. i did all she wanted me to do. Now i know that for some girls.. everything aint enough.
I cant seem to let her in my past.. i dont want to give up..
What should i do.. Did i do something wrong? She called me romantic.. did i overdo it?
Please someone help.. i love her.. but i dont want give up.