Asking girlfriend to dress more feminine?

[SteveM]

Hi,

I know this sounds like a silly question but here goes.

My girlfriend is a lovely girl, very sweet and smart and fun. I only have one hangup and it's that she just never likes to dress up like a girl.
She's so naturally beautiful but she doesn't dress her age or stylish.

She's a jeans and top sort of girl which is great 99% of the time but personally I love when the weekend comes especially and going out with friends and putting on my nice clothes, shirts, pants, cool shoes, etc. It's a long week, I don't have to wear "work" clothes and I just love feeling good and having fun.

It's just that when we do go out she tends to dress down a bit casual. She wears flip flops, denim shirts up to her belly and probably a tanktop or t-shirt. Sometimes even a little more casual than when we just go somewhere during the day.

I hate saying it but I love going out to nice places with my friends and going to events and restaurants and places were people get dressed up especially at the weekends. My problem is I love having my girlfriend come along but I sometimes feel she doesn't fit in. While my friends and thei girlfriends like to wear nice dresses or at least stylish clothes, she likes to wear flip flops and then denim skirts which make her look much older than she is, or just old jeans.

I kinda shy away from bringing her to events or functions where I know the dress code will be stylish as while everyone else there will get all done up for an event she just likes to go casual.

I feel bad for saying it. I know she's great in lots of ways but I feel it's wrong to not want to bring her to nice places as she doesn't seem to be into it.

It seems like a horrible thing to think about breaking up with someone for but its just more a case of being compatible or not. I'd like my girlfriend to enjoy similar things to me and if she'd rather dress down or not go to things I like to go to then what is the right thing to do?

As I said, she's great in other ways but I hate when I feel like I need to spend my friday night infront of the TV after a long week instead of going out and relaxing and feeling good with friends and so on.

There's no nice way to suggest it to her is there? What do you girls think?

[vashti]

I don't know what your financial situation is like, but maybe you want to take her out and buy her a nice outfit as a gift? That would be a lot more kind than simply saying "you don't dress nicely enough to go here with me".

[iateyourcookie]

Oh, trust me, I'm that type of girl too... until my bf buys me a dress. Ultimately it was me who wanted to dress more femininely... with my bf's encouragement. You should give her compliments and drop little hints like 'you know, I think you'd look good in a dress.' and one day, who knows, she'd buy one and try it on AND love it. Maybe get her a dress that looks casual BUT formal at the same time so that she doesn't have to completely shun her 'casual-ness', if you know what I mean. Good luck!

[lilxcutie53]

Yeah I agree. Instead of telling her what she should wear you should suggest as a compliment what she would look really good in that way she kinda gets the hint, but it doesnt feel insulting.

[clove]

get her the kind of clothes you'd like to see her in
It will make you feel less embarassed and she'll feel pampered

[sensualtulip]

From my experience, she probably feels uncomfortable and self-conscious (just as most girls do), and finds it hard to dress herself up without feeling goofy, out of place, or like she is being fake. Especially if there are other girls around, and she ever feels like she is being compared to them. I like the ideas the other girls have, of taking her out to pick out something. Maybe set up a special weekend, where you start the day shopping, for a new outfit, maybe even a new haircut and getting her nails done, with the incentive of telling her you are planning a "fancy, special, night, just for the two of us." That way you aren't taking complete control, but you are pushing the idea into her mind. Remember to compliment, compliment, compliment! Don't just say it, show it, be more affectionate, and make her feel comfortable in her own skin. Encouragement is key to confidence. Then take her out to a nice dinner! As promised, just the two of you. Any girl would love that! : )