Ex called my house (on accident?) and then texted me later

[paigem]

Basically, my house phone rang today at 3pm (Christmas Eve Day) and I saw the caller id was my ex's cell. It rang once. Thought it was a mistake but went into the hallway to see my mom had picked up the phone and kept saying hello hello hello. She hung up and told me there was a buzzing sound...but my mom doesn't know what it sounds like when a phone accidentally dials from a person's pocket....I shook it off as a mistake...but a rather odd one on Christmas Eve Day...

Then at 6:30pm I receive a text from my ex personalizing his message: "Merry Christmas Eve, Paige!!!"

I have no idea what to say or whether to say anything...because there is still tomorrow and there's a chance he'll send me another text tomorrow saying merry christmas and then there's new years too....I'm trying to do NO CONTACT and the holidays are messing it all up!!!! I don't want to text him back because I hate him for many reasons that he doesn't even know of...but I guess I should because it's the holidays. I just don't know what to say.

"You too" or "Same to you" no exclamations. ??? But then I still need something to say tomorrow too. And then new years....ugh!

[Nineball]

did you break up with him or was it the other way around?

[Gratedwasabi]

Why would you respond? Delete it, ignore it.

[paigem]

He broke up with me, but he was nice about it and said we'd be friends. We cried and held each other and it took us 3 days to say goodbye while I tried to convince him to stay with me. He just felt we'd had too many fights and were not right for each other and needed to experience other things and become our own person because he thinks we don't know who we are.

So what do I do?

[Nineball]

i see how you're in a bit of a pickle. you don't want to come off as mean by not responding, but at the same time you would like to maintain no contact for the sake of how things ended. if you want him back, i wouldn't respond. let him ponder on the idea about why you aren't responding. you'll then be in his thoughts the entire weekend. he might contact you again asking why you have been ignoring him. that's when you decide whether or not you would like to maintain communication with him.

if you absolutely hate him, don't want him back, and don't care for his attention, i would probably delete his number.

[red_sparrow]

Goodness.

Women should never try to convince men to stay with them. Men are the way they are for a reason--namely, most of them don't want women lingering around them like desperate f-king leeches. Nothing drives a man wilder than a strong woman.

[calisurfjump]

Don't return the text or the call and delete his number. As hard as it seems try to maintain the 'no contact' rule. We broke up a few days ago and I deleted his number and will try my hardest not to contact him period. Even if he contacts me I won't reply. You as well as I need a clean break for a few months at least. Then when our emotions are grounded and in control I might contact him or not, if he wants to get a hold of me he will...I try not to think that far ahead. If we're meant to remain friends it will happen, if not then life goes on.

[Boisdevie]

He said 'we'd be friends' is a way of trying to break up with somebody and lessening the impact. Ignore this guy. Don't contact him and instead try to find somebody else.

[paigem]

I'd believe that the "We'd be friends" was just to lessen the impact of breaking up if he wasn't actually trying to be my friend... I have not contacted him since (for nearly 35 days) in any way whatsoever except I responded to his "Happy Thanksgiving!" message with the same...that was the last time I contacted him. He has "liked" four of my pictures on facebook within the span of the 35 days and one of my statuses saying I booked a touring job for six months. He sent my family a christmas card addressed to me and my parents and wrote a paragraph about how he thinks of us during Christmastime! And hopes we have an amazing Christmas eve, Christmas day and New Year! And then he signed it sincerely with a smiley face next to his name.....

I didn't send him a thing. And then yesterday with the personalized text where he put my name in his message...he is trying to be my friend. Not too hard...but small things he has done in the past month to try to be friendly. What's up with that?

And now I'm worried me not responding pissed him off because he put up a facebook status last night with a quote from A Christmas Carol: ‎"There is never enough time to do or say all the things that we would wish. The thing is to try to do as much as you can in the time that you have. Remember Scrooge, time is short, and suddenly, you're not here any more." -- Ghost of Christmas present.

Don't know if he's calling me a Scrooge in that status...or what. Or maybe it's not even for me to see. But I'm sure it upset him or makes him wonder why I didn't respond to him yesterday. I just don't know if he shook it off and doesn't care.

[Boisdevie]

Look, he is YOUR EX. Why do you feel the need to contact him at all or respond to any message he sends? I lived with my ex partner for 7 years and never ever send any of the 'how are you doing' kind of messages because IT IS OVER. Move on with your life.

[damn2010]

He is ready to be friends (maybe) or get you as a friend-with-benefits.

You are clearly not over him. He dumped YOU and is out seeing other women like you said before. He is also making no motions saying "Hey, I think I made a mistake.." or "Hey, I want to talk about us...",etc. so there is no motion that he actually wants you back, you just think he does.

Stop looking at his facebook and either you tell him via text you want your SPACE or you just do no contact. If you don't want to be perceived as "rude" or "mean", then text him saying you appreciate the card and texts but that he dumped you and you need your space right now and will not be responding to any of his texts in the near future.

What would you do if you dumped a guy and he kept trying to get back with you?

[paigem]

Just found out my MOM TEXTED MY EX yesterday on Christmas Eve. I found it in her phone cause I decided to look...something told to me to when I saw it laying on the kitchen counter. She texted him at 5:30pm yesterday and said : Thank you for the card. Merry Christmas.

And he texted her back: You are very welcome. I'm thinking of you guys. I hope you all have a wonderful Christmas! Thank you for everything.

THEN an hour later he texted me : Merry Christmas Paige!!! and again Merry Christmas!!!! today.

I am livid and feel so betrayed by my mother. I took the Christmas card and never let her even read it and she wanted to hang it up in the house! And I said it's not her concern and it's my ex and I don't want the card up.

So, I really feel a bit in a position now since I didn't text him yesterday or today. And I'm so upset.

[calisurfjump]

My ex and I broke up a few days ago and I'm a firm believer in the 'no contact' rule, even on facebook. I deleted him from my friends, might sound childish, but I don't wanna know anything about him right now. I know it's tough, but you have to move on. Even if he txts me I wont reply. He's the one who dumped me, so why would he contact me. Same can be said in your situation, just walk away. I know easier said than done, but you gotta be strong.

[jamiegirl19]

it sounds like he realized he messed up badly - his loss