My very difficult situation.

[Ghost141]

Hello one and all,

Here is my problem that is absolutely wrecking my life right now but it has been a long term thing:

I have known for a long time that I have been very attracted to this amazing, beautiful young woman who almost instantly lit a fire inside of me when I met her... But she also happens to be my sisters best friend, and I mean BEST friend. My sister is very protective of her relationship with this person as she really has helped my sister get through some very hard times when our parents split and has been with her through her entire school life. So I never have had the chance to talk to this person alone because I was afraid that I would hurt my sister or her relationship with this person or that I would just mess things up in general.

This person and I do have a good relationship. I have known her for about 5 years, We like a lot of the same things, were always laughing with each other or cracking jokes about each other, and we just seem to click well. She is the most respectful, strong, well mannered, beautiful woman I know of outside of my mother. Recently I have really come to terms that I would really like to get to know this woman on a much deeper level and that I really think she is a great person.

I really do want to talk to this person to let her know what I feel and to see what she feels and as I have become more aware of my desire to do so I have also been bothered by the fact that I could really ruin things If I go about it the wrong way. I did have a few chances to do so recently but held back due to not being able to have any privacy and that if things didn't go right It would of ruined things for everyone around us.

A small part of me has also said that even though I really like this woman that maybe I should just suppress my emotions and not say anything because even though im not it feels to me like im trying to take away my sisters best friend.

Now that they are going to be spending more time apart going to different schools, although still pretty close to each other, I feel like I may have a better chance now that their not always going to be hanging onto each other at every waking moment.

So people, What should I do?

Shoot for the stars and let her know how I feel or do I swallow my feelings out of respect for my sister and just live with the fact that I never said anything to her. This is a really really tough situation for me, I dont ever want to hurt my sister yet I want soo bad to talk to this person .

Thanks so much for all of your ideas and help with this issue.

[kitkitkitty]

i actually think that you need to talk to your sister first. she's the one that you're worried about hurting so before even contemplating talking to this girl have a long chat with your sis to see where she'd stand in all of this.

[Ghost141]

I have talked to her at length about this, Kinda forgot to include that. She says that she is ok with me talking to this person as she knows I'm a good guy and wouldn't hurt her best friend. I dont really know if it was the shock of me telling her that or what but she still seems to be very reserved about the idea of me talking to this person. I have promised that I will never wreck things or destroy her relationship with this person even if I were to get turned down, there will be nothing but respect and things will move on as they were the way before.

[kitkitkitty]

how long ago did you talk about this? maybe have another little chat just to make yourself feel better as she'll also have gotten over a possible 'initial shock'. then go from there.