Is he interested?

[questiongirl]

I like this guy at work but I can't figure out if he's interested in me.

Ok, it sounds a little strange but he works at our copy center, so I'm kind of many levels (in terms of job position) above him (but we're the same age).

Once we were talking about a game and I said if you decided to go let me know I probably go with you. He looked a little surprised but didnt ask for my number. Next day, he said he didn't call me because he didnt have my number. It was kind of in front of my boss' office so I wasnt dare to say anything but changed the topic.

Afer that, one day he was sick and the next day I asked if he's feeling better and stuff. Again, he was a little surprised, acted kind of nervous and foolish, but had a very big foolish smile on his face. I was kind of like, what's the problem with him? But he was very happy to see me after that (at least I think so).

Last week, I went to the cafeteria where the secretaries have lunch and was having lunch there. He walked in, saw me, but tried to sit with the secretaries (they are older, so it's not that he's interested in them), but their table was full. So, I said you can sit with me. That caused some stares from the secretaries, but I dont care. He came by but kind of hesitated whether he should sit direct across me, and finally decided to sit one chair away from me. I was a little disappointed but we still had a nice coversation. I asked him where he lives, where he goes for fun and stuff. He asked whether I live by myself, where I grew up and stuff. We were both eating kind of slow and talked. But I dont think he was looking at me in a flirting way, he's just kind of nervous all the time.

Genearlly, he's always nice to me, smile, say hello when run into each other. Whenever he passes by my office, he looks into my office and wave. But he's always kind of nervous around me while pretty at ease with others, which I dont understand cuz I'm always really nice to him. Sometimes I catch him in the hallway and try to talk to him, he's always kind of nervous, doesnt know what to say and kind of run a way. So strange! Is he interested or not? What should I do?

[lastwish]

He sounds shy. He might be intimitated by you (maybe because you are in a higher job position than him?). You can continue talking to him until he gets more comfortable. Talk to him about casual stuff. Don't suggest another date for now.

[Gigabitch]

Maybe he has the good judgment to avoid getting involved with people at work.

[Lozenger]

It sounds like this guy could be interested in you and that he is just shy about it. Men quite often sound as though they are making a forced, instinctive comment maybe because they are nervous or because they are keen to impress you.

But he may think that you have a thing for him because a lot of men tend to mistake friendliness for sexual interest and that could be why he is a little nervous around you.

I would, like other people have said, continue talking to him so that he can be more comfortable around you.

Also, other signs that he is interested in you would include dilated pupils. When he is talking to you he will often rotate looking at your eyes, hair and lips and depending on what you are wearing he will also look briefly at your legs and boobs.
Also, body mirroring is a sign - like if you fold your arms when talking, does he fold his arms?


I hope this helps

[questiongirl]

Thanks for the replies. Here's some updates . . .
Good signs: 1. He sat right beside me at lunch yesterday and we both enjoyed sitting together.
2. He now stops and chats briefly with me when he passes by my office, instead of just waving.
3. He's not nervous anymore.
3. He teased me couple times.
4. He passes by my office at least once or twice a day(more often).

Bad signs: 1. No obvious flirting with me.
22. One day he was all dressed up and smelled good and was obviously texting sb. (did he go on a date?!)

Mixed signs:
1. He looked at my fashion magazine, I jokingly asked him "you want to buy your girlfriend a new purse?" He said "No(very strong tone..then a little pause), it's for myself(jokingly)." Why didnt he say "No, I dont have a girlfriend?" I asked that question in front of a lot of people though.
2. His friend invited me to go to a bar(his friend is a DJ), I said "let me ask my friend, if she goes I'll go." Then I asked if he's going, he said "No, not until May cuz I'm in training and quit drinking for April." I was disappointed. Does that mean he's not interested?

How should I proceed? I want to ask my friend to ask his friend if he has a gf, is that a good idea?