How to make the correct approach? A, B, C, D or E.

[DesperateGuy]

I recently met a girl at work for about two weeks. We had a nice chat at lunch recently for about 20 minutes plus another 10 minutes few days earlier when I was getting close with her at work.

The reason I had a chance have lunch with her because I waited for her to clock-off first and then I clocked out a bit later and met her in the food court like a "coincident". Well, my initial thought was "I am a stalker, oh well, but what can I do to know her better first." I mean no girl would going out with a stranger. A foundation must build first in a relationship and I wanted to go nice and smooth.

From what I know so far, she is six years younger than me and she is a grade 12 student and she needs to repeat one more year because she is a new immigrant from China. I said that I can help her on the English but she needs to teach me Mandarin. She is laughing and I was smiling because we didn't want to get anything too seriously. (Note: I am Chinese too but know nothing about Mandarin.)

A. Should I have lunch with her again on purpose, even when it is my day off? (I do not want to ask her specifically because meal schedules aren't fix and I can wait in the food court)

B. Should I let her know my number and wait for her to call? One of my supervisor from another store said "Men should be confident to give out the numbers because a lot of time she will call if she is interested." I would say something like. "Here is my number, let me know if you need help on your assignment."

C. Or a low-profile approach: Slip a small note or card into her locker with only my email address and write "If you need help with your assignment, attach it to the email and I can edit for you"

D. Just ask for her phone number in subtle way when she is at her locker. I would say something like "Gee, my cell phone seems having some problem, can you call my number to see if it works? Oh, I guess it does." I would have her number because of the the caller ID technology.

E. None of the above. Waited for two months more before proceed any of the above. Get familar with each other first at work.

[Gigabitch]

I like either option A or option E. The others are too sneaky- B puts the ball in her court prematurely, C is too risky- she might not see the note, and D is just dumb.

Straightforward is better than clever. Ask her for her phone number directly the next time you "accidently" see her in the food court. Trying to be where she is does not necessarily make you a stalker, btw. Not when you have every right to be there in the first place. If you "accidentally" saw in her bathroom window, there might be a problem.

Good luck!

[Gribble]

"Accidentally" stumbling headfirst into her breasts is okay, too.

[Junket]

I'm hesitant about the whole "if you need help" thing.

You gotta remember somethin' about chicks, sometimes, they're kinda dumb, and don't realize when guys are coming on to them, and take what you offer at face value. "Oh, look! What nice guy this is! He would make a spectacular friend!"

While working on assignments is a great excuse to be with that person, you'll have find other things outside of work to make your relationship more personal if you want to be more than a friend/mentor to this foreign chick.

[Gigabitch]

That's a very good point, Fras. That could easily be misinterpreted as platonic.

DesperateGuy, are you any good at flirting? I think you should turn on the charm.

[LuvSickStagger]

"Accidentally" stumbling headfirst into her breasts is okay, too.

LOL!

I've actually made it a point to not date anyone I work with. It's caused friction in the past...
Then again, I've also quit jobs then asked out a former co-worker
Just my opinion... If you really want to proceed I'd go with option A.

[The Great OV!!!]

I don't need advice from someone named "Desperate"guy.

[DesperateGuy]

Thanks Guys. One more question to the above. What does it means flirting with someone? I know what the defination is but sometimes charm is not an easy thing to master because people could often see me pretending.

[Gribble]

Basically the way I flirt is I tell jokes. I might think a girl has a great smile, but maybe I'm a little shy. Instead of just stating it, I'd make some kind of joke which alludes to it. For me it comes natural. I can't really sit and think it up, it just sort of pops out of my mouth as we're talking. You might need to think up your clever jokes in advance. Nothing wrong with a little scripted flirting until you get the hang of it.

[clynn]

oooh, yah, that's good flirting