Having trouble with one particular girl...

[Arrow]

So, there is this girl I met a few months ago... At first I wasn't really interested in her but we became a little closer and she even made me a compliment regarding my shape. Then in a conversation I had with her, she said she had broken up her 1-year-long relationship and I decided to move in and make an attempt at getting closer. I invited her to go out but she said on Friday she had to study because of classes on the day after and on Saturday she already had been invited by friends that weekend (it was true, in fact she told me before I invited her).

Two months ago I decided to lend her some papers of the classes she had missed (I myself paid for the copies) and I left her my cellphone number in case she didn't understand my handwriting. She insisted to refund me but I told her it was a small gift. A week later I sent her a box of chocolate where she worked and she liked it very much. Her mom saw it as she worked with her. She even got on MSN to thank me (she is rarely online), asked me for a photo and allowed me to see her in her webcam (she looked very cute because she was going out with some girls she knew). She said she was eating the chocolate up until that moment... During this time her ex started trying to get back with her but apparently she doesn't want to (they used to fight a lot). I tried repeated times (about three) to talk to her on MSN but succeded only once (didn't really say more than "hi" or "how are you" so as not to scare her off).

When classes started again we had some very nice talks with each other and she even explained to me that she didn't answer me because she wasn't in front of the computer. She told me a bit about her perception of people around her and I sent her an email in which I said I agreed to that (which was true as I did have the same problems some time ago). During the week things got colder between us and on Friday her ex tried to close in on her which made me suffer a lot because, even though she didn't look like she wanted him to be near, she was talking to him normally. On Monday I mostly ignored her and I was going to do the same on Tuesday but when I said hi to her she said she had finally received my email and was so happy with reading all that and even said she laughed at some of the funnier remarks I made. She showed concern for me because she wanted to lend me her notebook so I could get a few classes I missed, and I wanted to show some retribution by lending her some material again.

On Thursday I invited her to a roommates' meeting that was going to take place on Saturday but she said she didn't want to go as she had to write a project and didn't like those kinds of meeting ("everyone just drinks, plays cards and talks about useless stuff") and on top of that didn't like the people from my class. We had a nice talk and then I gave her the idea of borrowing her notebook while I lended her my papers, she said it was better if we went together to take copies of the material as she didn't want me to see some letters in her notebook. So I tried to funnily ask her if she had an admirer or something but she nervously replied that she had an ex, which was much more complicated than having an admirer. I apologised to her and changed subject and she started to talk to me about her goals in life and what she liked. When we arrived she met some friends with whom she made plans to go out next week, but didn't really invite me. The day after, I planned to give her some space so as to not seem so invasive but I overheard her conversations with some people from my room and she was inviting people to her next week appointment!!! Even some guys that backstab her a bit... And she didn't openly invite me... Then when asked by a friend of mine if she wanted to go to the roommates meeting I invited her to, she acted kinda friendlier and only mentioned the studies she had to do. I was very nervous and I'm afraid I demonstrated that which takes points away from me.

For the rest of the day I kept my distance but I wanted to cry as I thought she wasn't being truthful with me and, despite the good things I've done to her, didn't really consider me a close person.

So, I'm in this tight situation... I really like her and she's worth having a relationship with because she's superb. But I'm unsure of what she thinks about me and I don't want to seem as suffocating as her ex (which is what I think drove her away from him). From what I heard she's looking for a more mature man and, on top of all, a friend. However, I never really had a longlasting relationship before and this makes me very nervous when approaching her as I don't want to do anything wrong. Pleeease don't tell me to give up as we'll still be seeing each other for a long time and there's plenty of things to try still. The ex doesn't seem to be a threat as well.

Also I'm sorry for the long first post but I needed to tell the whole story...

[starbuck]

What exactly are you asking, arrow? Are you asking for advice on how to court her?

Maybe you should just ask her out. Asking someone out on a date is not smothering her.

[Arrow]

I'm asking about how should I get near her because I'm afraid she might consider me a suffocator.

She's also my classmate and sometimes girls don't want to date classmates although in my college room there are no less than two couples.

To sum it up, I'd like to know whether I've been doing it right, what's the meaning of her actions, whether she's inclined to date me and what to do next. It will be difficult to date her during the week as she has plenty of commitments and she studies a lot, so the opportunity would be to maybe lunch with her or something else. But I'm still bugged that she didn't openly invite me to her appointment next week, and I'd have loved to go. Some of the girls she's going out with are friends of mine too...

[starbuck]

I don't think anyone can tell you what's in her head unfortunately. Just ask her out. Instead of hinting around and waiting for her to pick up on it, you could go out there and get her. And if she turns you down, then you can move on. You know the old cliche: You have to break a few eggs to make an omlet (or something like that).